“As Westerners we have not
integrated within our religious consciousness, our psyche,
that aspect of the Divine Reality that is change and death.
We are divided from it. We are split in our
What you are always
running from and at the same time protecting, defending and constantly preoccupied with?
The Development of
we talk of ego, it is as if we are talking about a man with
a body and limbs. It has a basic makeup and it has its
tentacles, so to speak, as well. Its basic makeup consists
of paranoia and confusion. But at the same time, its basic
makeup started from some kind of wisdom as well, because
there is the possibility that we don’t exist as individual
entities or as solid persons who can continue all the time.
There is the possibility that as individuals we consist of
particles or of lots of things but those particles
don’t exist as individuals either.
When that possibility first
flashes onto itself, there’s sudden panic.
If this is the case, we’ll have to put up some kind of
defense mechanism to shield out any possible discovery of
the nonexistence of ourselves. We begin to play the game of
deaf and dumb. We would like to be individuals who are
continuously existing, continuously surviving, continuously
being one person, not even making the journey through time
The ego, the moment to moment (constant) creation of a
sense of separate self creates
fear. The emotion of
fear is not happening to you it is your own creation.
Wherever there is the sense of subject, object, or
relationships, there is fear, and fear then makes the
adventure of existence.
This separate sense of self is created spontaneously and
unconsciously and the heartbeat alone is responsible for
your primal belief in your own existence. The heartbeat is
the most primitive incident and the center of fear and the
one great fear is that if the heartbeat stops, you
disappear. The heartbeat shocks us with its rhythm, with its
striking, pounding movement and the only salvation in this
fear is to penetrate this motion, this sound, this signal
that shocks us into fear.
The primal incident is not any thought nor the sense of
“me,” but it is the heartbeat and in reaction, vital shock –
the knot in the pit of your stomach. The heartbeat in the
center of the body-being is the ultimate meditation. It is
the single motivator of life. It is the principal illusion
of all beings. All beings have in common this beat,
everything that lives, that is self-conscious, is meditating
on the beat or intensity that is the heart. The heartbeat
alone is responsible for the whole adventure and
complication of existence.
The primal incident is differentiation of the One and
Present Reality, which is Infinite Consciousness, from Love,
Radiance, Light, and Vibratory Life, or all the Infinite
Eternity at once. But in that instance of differentiation
the most primitive archetype of all knowledge appears. It
appears as a simple presumption of independent existence,
consciousness, and pleasure over against all kinds of
relations or objects, high and low.
This Primal Call, a scream for those who are sensitive to
the madness. This call creates religions and religions
answers, God or God-apart, the Creator with it’s infinite
numbers and kinds of relations and worlds – highs and lows –
separating self and God.
Birth and (the potentiality of) Death are simultaneously
created in this primal incident. Birth is usually associated
with shock as is death. As an incident both are usually
interpreted psychologically in terms of its
emotional-mental or subjective impact. But their
significance is in the event itself, the sudden
identification with the body and mind.
Birth is shock – vital shock, a recoil from life felt as
a cramp in the solar pelus. Life then becomes a drama of
struggling against an unbearable demand: survival,
relationship, incarnation, or love. We are a constant mood
of recoil, contraction, and self-possession along with a
constant demand for life’s requirements by virtue of
birth itself, the apparent independence of self all
relations. The feeling and actuality of independence is the
burden of living beings.
The whole process of the Way of The Heart involves
inspection and responsibility relative to the primal
incident of each moment. It involves inspection and
responsibility for subjective contraction, as ego, mind, and
limiting or separative identification with the apparent body
in any realm.
The sense of relationship, of me and you, us and them, is
the outcome of the primal incident. Fear or contraction is
the native and simultaneous reaction to this incident and
Understanding involves the ultimate responsibility for this
Resonsibility occurs through a natural pattern or process
of transformation toward maturity, for the reaction of fear.
In this Understanding and responsibility, the reaction of
independence, subjectivity, contraction, illusion, dilemma,
and fear has ceased to be necessary – so that the pattern of
arising conditions is no longer the basis for fear and
contraction around the illusion of self. Life is then
transformed into a creative process.
In this process the tendency of attention to be
associated with conditions is dissolved. At first
association with the grosser conditions continues. Then as
the tendency of those associations is gradually released, a
subtler disposition appears in this life. By our continuing
in this disposition of recognition, the tendency of
attention to associate and identify with conditional
existence in any plane whatsoever is dissolved in its prior
condition, which is essentially and always before the Primal
Incident or Big Bang.
This process of Understanding may not merely be presumed
in mind to be the case. There must be the Sacrifice, the
Transforming Fire, the Dissolution of knowledge,
preferences, the very being, the whole body or reflex that
is illusion of self. There must be revulsion or turning,
from “creature and creations” to the Source Condition, from
the worlds and all fascinations to the Truth of every
You cannot merely, by inverting upon the self essence,
identify with the the Source Condition. To invert upon the
self essence is merely to continue the reaction to fear. The
Process is true only in where the poles of the primal
incident, are resolved in Radiance, Bliss, or Love, without
center, objects, or bounds.
One can experience physical and vital well-being by
removing the sources of enervation and toxicity. One can
experience mental and emotional well-being, the clear and
quiet mind, by analyzing the structure of mental and
emotional problems. One can experience spiritual realization
and enjoy the form of reality in its superconscious shape by
dissolving the process of the radical avoidance of
relationship. But one will not cease to suffer, seek or
experience dilemma and identification with what is separate
unless one abides as no-seeking in the heart. Therefore,
understand and abide in every form of understanding, until
understanding becomes radical activity and realizes its
nature as consciousness itself.
Beezone edit and adaptation – from
the the writings of Adi Da Samraj
“What is feared, the moment to
moment fear, the threat, endings, the death that arises and
consumes it the truth itself. The paths are only
consolations that distract men from the core of fear at the
center of life. But one who understands is entirely in that
fear, that death. His consciousness is concentrated in that
fear and death, and there is nothing to turn him away. Thus
he endures that very core, he experiences it utterly, he
knows its content directly.
That fear is the critical space
in the Heart. It is the subtlest form of avoidance. It is
the avoidance of relationship itself. that death and fear is
not an object but an action, the avoidance of relationship,
sensed always as fear, theat, the death, the void, the
emptiness, the black of unconsciousness.
But when there is radical
understanding, the content of the space of the Heart is
known directly. Only avoidance makes the surrounding of fear
and black, emptiness and threat. But when that space is
known directly, prior to avoidance the death itself is
allowed, and it occurs.There is only that death, which is
the realization of non-separation, real consciousness. And
in that instant there is absolute release, exhileration, and
great joy. The very fact, the real, the moment that only is
knowledge, consciousness itself is known to be no dilemma,
and the mind widens to zero, the void is bright, and there
is only the brilliant, deep shout of bliss that is the
instant of existence. True life is itself the after-death
state, creative life prior to all seeking. The rest of it is
nonsense, the traditional distraction and fascination of
Adi Da Samraj
(Franklin Jones, 1971) – unpublished
According to Buddhist
psychology, the basis of neurosis is the tendency to
solidify energy into a barrier that separates space into two
entities, “I” and “Other”, the space in here and the space
out there. This process is technically termed “dualistic
fixation”. First there is the initial creation of the
barrier, the sensing of other, and then the inference of
inner, or I. This is the birth of ego. We identify with what
is in here and struggle to relate to what is out there. The
barrier causes an imbalance between inside and outside. The
struggle to redress the imbalance further solidifies the
wall. The irony of the barrier-creating process is that we
lose track of the fact that we have created the barrier and,
instead, act as if it was always there.
Beezone White and Orange Project* is based on
Ludwig Wittgenstein’s Blue & Brown Books books. The Blue
& Brown Books of Wittgenstein’s were dictated as a set
of notes to his student in 1934-1935.
Beezone will use three formats for assembling a project.
One is to present a short piece directly from Adi Da. Then
Beezone will write down the highlighted points from said
paragraph and/or a group of like paragraphs.
The second format is ‘thematic’. Beezone will take a
‘theme’ of Adi Da’s teaching and go through various talks
and essays and write down a sentence or two related to that
theme or topic.
Lastly is a compilation or remix. This is a blend of the
two other methods. In this style Beezone will take a number
of talks and essays based on a theme. Beezone will then use
the ‘cut-up’ method. The cut-up technique is an aleatory
literary technique in which a text is cut up and rearranged
to create a new text. This method can be traced to at least
the Dadaists of the 1920s, but was popularized in the late
1950s and early 1960s by writer William S. Burroughs, and
has since been used in a wide variety of contexts.