THE “BRIGHTENING” WAY TALK SERIES
The Yajna Discourses of Santosha Adi Da (1995-1996)
A Mastered Life
A Gathering “Consideration” with Adi Da Samraj
Sugar Bowl Ski Resort, California
December 29, 1995
AVATARA ADI DA: Yes, if you really feel that knot, you
don’t want to feel it. Hm? But it is the ground of your
ordinary life. You try to distract yourself from it
constantly, through seeking and self-indulgence and whatnot.
But if you really find out about yourself, find this knot,
find what your real experience is, then you won’t want to
put up with that. It will oblige you to do sadhana, to feel
constantly more and more beyond it.
DEVOTEE: Beloved, I feel this. I feel this need to go
beyond that, what this illusion is, very strongly now. it’s
something that You Gave me this year.
AVATARA ADI DA: Tcha.
DEVOTEE: I feel that it’s such a profound vision to see
life as an illusion. The Beauty of What is other than that,
you know, is just Shining more and more to me.
AVATARA ADI DA: Mm-hm.
But to Realize It you must utterly relinquish your
self-position. So that doesn’t make life a negatI’ve. That
just means that thats what life is about. Life is
inherently, by Law, sadhana, God-wardness, going beyond
Generally, people don’t seem to know anything about that.
So by Grace you may become aware of it, and no longer be
willing to be distracted by your cover-up, to keep yourself
somehow or other unaware of it and becoming very, then,
superficial, peripheral, in your mind, your body, your
feelings. But all the time you’re motivated by it. you’re
always seeking something or other. You even forget what the
hell you’re seeking. Or in one moment or other it’s this,
that, or the other particular thing, but always avoiding the
knowledge, the discovery, of your own action that is
producing all of that.
So it is a Grace to find it out. But it is not in itself
Graceful. In other words, it’s not a mere pleasure to find
this knot, you see, if, having found It out, you must do
sadhana. Otherwise, well, maybe youll forget a little bit
again by getting very superficial, but youll gI’ve up the
opportunity to deal with it.
DEVOTEE: Beloved, I feel that everything in the world is
about that. That is all it’s about, is avoiding that.
AVATARA ADI DA: Avoiding this knowledge of this knot. The
whole worlds avoiding this knowledge of the knot.
DEVOTEE: Everything that I’ve done, even in Your Company
and the practice that You’ve Given us, I’ve had to come to
see that everything I do, everything I do, everything I do,
AVATARA ADI DA: Mm.
DEVOTEE: … is intentionally keeping me from feeling
that and going beyond that.
AVATARA ADI DA: Well, truly, you’re only willing to feel
that knot that motivates you when you simultaneously,
Gracefully, discover What Transcends it and are given a
Wisdom that communicates itself to you so that you know how
to go beyond it. In other words, individuals will
automatically dissociate from this depth unless they can
somehow come to terms with it through the Graceful discovery
of What Transcends it and the finding of Wisdom to deal with
So when all those things coincide, and all of a sudden
you find you’re able to feel this thing that motivates you,
this knot, this disturbance, because you know that theres
something you can do about it, then there is the What to
Realize thats beyond it.
But still the sadhana is a matter of actually dealing
with this dis-ease. In other words, the religious life, this
Way in particular, is not about consolation merely and
distraction and so forth, in the conventional sense, or
ego-supporting sense. The process, moment to moment, goes
beyond the self-contraction, particularly as hearing
awakens. Thats when there is most profound understanding,
knowing of this self-contraction, and that it is your own
activity. But even the sadhana from the beginning is about
going beyond this knot and not avoiding it through
conventional-mindedness and consolation and such.
So the actual process is to stay in place, in this place
of separate self, surrendering to Me, to the point of
self-forgetting Communion with Me, true going beyond it.
it’s that from the beginning, not merely after hearing. Even
from the beginning it is so. But you have to understand that
thats what the sadhana is about, or you will miss the point
and think the religious life is about consolation or mere
behavior and so forth.
You are to stand in that position of that knot, feeling
your own dis-ease, motivation.
DEVOTEE PENGELLEY: it’s so painful just to feel that,
AVATARA ADI DA: But it’s there anyway. [DEVOTEE:
Yeah.] So you must embrace this Way and actually go
But that means you have to endure it over the period of
your sadhana. Theres not only the fundamental knot itself .
There are all of it’s reflections in the body-mind,
tendencies of one kind or another, and so on. You have to
endure the purification of these things by standing in the
knot-position, sensitI’ve to all the limitations of your
disposition, and surrender to Me to the point of forgetting
it, relinquishing it, keeping the faculties all focused in
Me, in this Communion Only then do you make this knot
You initially go through a process of purification where
the resultant knots, the different kinds of behaviors,
attitudes, and so forth, that bind you appear. These must be
purified through the initial stages of sadhana, even up to
the “Perfect Practice”. So the initial sadhana is purifying,
and it’s necessarily, then, a matter of being in touch with
this knot in life-difficulties and so on, all tendencies
that would make life difficult. Instead of dramatizing them,
maintain the discipline of this Way and practice this
Communion every moment.
In this manner you will be purified by this Communion
with Me in all those areas that are relaxed, forgotten,
disciplined. So that more and more the practice becomes
extraordinarily concentrated, not in peripheral matters of
experiencing and so on but in the root itself . And then the
“Perfect Practice” can begin. So, once sufficient
purification has occurred, that there is this extraordinary
concentration, then suddenly My Instruction about the
Witness becomes inherently Obvious and is thereafter not
something that can be forgotten.
it’s not a something that can be forgotten. it’s not
merely a thought. it’s a noticing that you never forget.
it’s a noticing even beyond the mind.
Now, you can notice it, of course, for a moment, if I
Call you to.
[Beloved Adi Das Voice becomes quiet.] I mean,
isnt it true, right now? No matter what is arising, you are
the Witness of it? [Quiet assent from devotees.]
But to Stand in the Witness-Position itselflf, truly,
requires purification of attention, and therefore of the
bondage signs in the body-mind altogether, and in life,
So sadhana is tapas. You must be in the place of the
knot, sensitI’ve to the limitations in your own disposition,
but in every moment-instead of dramatizing that-disciplining
it, surrendering it to Me, entering into Communion with Me
by forgetting the content that is simply the garbage result
of not living in Truth in the past. So it has to be made
obsolete. All the modifications of the fundamental Reality
must be purified and transcended. What there is to Realize
is the Unconditional Reality, the Reality that is Always
Already the case, even now.
Now you are preoccupied with the modifications of that
Reality, that Divine Reality, distracted by them and
dissociated from the fundamental Reality by this very knot.
You must enter into depth, no superficiality, as you did in
the first part of this consideration. Ordinarily you are not
doing so in the fullest or stable sense, you see. And so as
soon as you relax into your just fundamental feeling, you
feel a knot there. You don’t simply feel the inherent
Love-Bliss of Reality-but you do feel It, Flowing through
it, but you’re experiencing this knot in the midst of It. To
Realize the Divine Self-Condition, you have to go beyond
So it’s not really a matter of thinking, accumulating
experience, and so on. it’s a matter of being established in
that place, surrendering to Me to the point of
self-forgetting. And this allows a course of purification
and development that becomes the “Perfect Practice” and
ultimately the seventh stage Demonstration. It is truly an
inevitable process, able to go by it’s appropriate stages
and so forth, unless you step outside the process itself and
become superficial again. But if you stay with the process
itselflf, as I have GI’ven it to you altogether, then the
development is inevitable.
So if your development in this Way is slow, it’s because
you’re stepping outside the process. it’s not that the
process itself is retarded.
This is why the hearing matter is so profound and
fundamental to this Way. it’s the foundation of the process
that must develop, because it’s about finding the self-knot,
the self-contraction, finding it as your own activity,
feeling it’s disturbed, ill-at-ease characteristic but also
even in every moment of such sensitivity enjoying the
capability to feel beyond it in this Communion with Me.
So hearing is the first great step beyond the initiation
of Ishta-Guru-Bhakti Yoga. In other words, the first
dimension of the process is concentrated in the awakening of
hearing, because you must enjoy and suffer this capability
to stand in the egoic position and feel beyond it. If you
don’t do that, then if you faked your way on to level 2 and
then beyond and so forth, youd simply be involved in a kind
of evolutionary or developmental ego-game. Whereas the Way
of the Heart is about the transcendence of egoity.
DEVOTEE OMAHONY: I saw that, Beloved, when I was
Contemplating You. I was feeling this knot of
self-contraction and the Bliss of Your Beautiful Form at the
same time. I felt Your Current of Energy, and It threw me
back into the sense of the descending Current and something
like “the Thumbs”. But when that happened, I lost sight of
the self-contraction and I also lost sight of the Bliss of
Your Form. So there was something about the …
AVATARA ADI DA: You lost sight of that, too?
DEVOTEE: [Laughs.] When that happened, I just
noticed that I got absorbed in myself rather than in
AVATARA ADI DA: Tcha.
DEVOTEE: That was an example of the fact that I’m not
hearing. Just even that moment of distraction, I could feel
it as such.
AVATARA ADI DA: Mm-hm. Because you’re experiencing it as
an event happening to You. Whereas hearing is about that
unique understanding in which the self-contraction is not
something happening to you. it’s something that you do. Only
when that is discovered have you discovered the capability
itselflf, so that you can continue doing it. it’s a unique
discovery, most profound discovery. And it’s the basis for
the rest of the Way of the Heart. it’s what allows it to be
a truly ego-transcending process and not merely a
developmental or ego-evolving process.
DEVOTEE: Theres never been anything like it, Beloved.
AVATARA ADI DA: Tcha.
it’s also for this reason that in the general case the
transition from maturity at level 3, the transition can be
made at that point to the “Perfect Practice”, in the general
case. Because the Way is not an evolutionary process, but
it’s about ego-transcendence, and thats the fundamental
understanding associated with true hearing. So in general
what follows from there is simply the fundamental process of
seeing Me, not merely having Spiritual experiences in My
Company but “Locating” Me, and then the next step is the
So hearing is what allows that unique process. It has
some features to it for which you can find analogies in the
Great Tradition, but fundamentally it is utterly unique.
DEVOTEE: So Beloved, when someone is seeing, that person
never loses sight of Your Form.
AVATARA ADI DA: Yes. you’re entered into My Form, not
merely having experiences in your own apparent form, or
body-mind, you see, but felt beyond that into My Spiritual
Person. Then the Force of My Spiritual Attraction will draw
you into the heart place on the right, and the “Perfect
Practice” can begin.
DEVOTEE: Beloved, I remember one time when I was driving
up to the Mountain Of Attention here when I was living in
Marin. I was a single person at the time. And I believe it
was during the time of the Love of the God-Man Celebration.
I had never seen You before. I was relatI’vely new. Anyway,
for a moment as I was driving my car, I happened to look
across at these two people driving alongside me. They were
an older couple. But it was like You Said, for a moment I
was in the Witness-Position, just for-I don’t know how long
it was. But it just became very clear that it was the state
that I’m never in, or very, very, rarely.
AVATARA ADI DA: it’s not uncommon for people to report
something like this, though, having either occasional or
frequent experiences of that kind.
DEVOTEE: I did recognize that it was through Your Grace
that I was allowed to Witness this.
AVATARA ADI DA: I’ve told you all about My experience
with Sue Ellen Beckman [when Avatara Adi Da was a
teenager], when Id be standing on her doorstep? Thats
similar to what you’re suggesting, DEVOTEE. It happened to
Me many times, and it generally would always be in the same
place, too. Id be saying goodnight to her at her house, shed
be about a step above Me, Id be looking at her, and suddenly
there was no familiarity whatsoever. No thinking about
anything, no being a body, no recognizing names, faces, or
what a face is and not only being the Witness as attention
might be, observing, but more than that, such that there was
a direct awareness of the infinite Field that is the True
Domain of the Witness.
So this sense that DEVOTEE described and that I have
Described is not an uncommon experience. Spontaneously it
happens to people. Maybe sometimes people don’t really make
much of it or notice very much about it. They just forget
about it. But of course phenomena such as these are
cultivated in this Way. They are a potential, by Grace, in
My Company, all kinds of experiences. So devotees commonly
report experiences, even as beginners, that are in the
domain of the advanced stages of life and the
Witness-Position, and so on. These experiences should
inspire you and gI’ve you a sense of what this Way is all
about and so forth.
AVATARA ADI DA: But you still have to do the sadhana. The
sadhana is staying in touch with your own very action in
this moment and going beyond it, forgetting it in Communion
with Me. If you just look for experiences-so-called
Spiritual experiences, psychic experiences, or blisses in
the body, whatever-you’re becoming superficial again. Those
experiences may come or go, but to look for them, to avoid
the sadhana of staying in place where that knot is and
feeling beyond it is to waste the opportunity of this
So experiences may come and go. Devotees have
experiences, certainly, and basically they serve to inspire
you. Thats about it. The sadhana is just the same thing
every moment. it’s not boring. it’s the fundamental living
event. But you must persist, moment by moment by moment. To
be renounced in this Way is to be in the disposition of
going beyond the self-contraction. But it’s also to be in
the disposition of renouncing attachment to or search for
conditional experiences. In other words, you persist in the
fundamental sadhana rather than pursue such things.
DEVOTEE: Then doesn’t that occur quite naturally as a
AVATARA ADI DA: Which? The experiences?
AVATARA ADI DA: Yes, the experiences, as I Say, come
about spontaneously, but theyre not themselves the sadhana
and theyre not something to cling to or to pursue or try to
repeat and so on. So you must persist in the sadhana. Of
course, that means you have to know what this sadhana is.
Weve been talking about it for a while before you two
[indicating Rod and Julia] arrI’ved. But the others
of you know what we talked about.
And the conversations we had at Sugar Bowl and the
conversation I had with the Kanyas the other night that was
recorded are other considerations I’ve put to you recently
to serve devotees generally, but also in particular to serve
this Lay Renunciate Order matter. Even up to today, it hasnt
gone very far. I’m having to remind everybody what this most
profound sadhana is really all about and Call you all who
are considering this LRO matter to consider all that very
So it’s no small matter to hear Me.
DEVOTEE: it’s not for fools.
AVATARA ADI DA: No. So for individuals to be accepted,
relatI’ve to this LRO matter, for level 1.3 or level 2,
there must be the signs of all this profundity. People think
it’s such a big deal to discipline themselves, that they
want to be patted on the back for a little bit of
straightening themselves out. Sometimes thats enough for
some people to start thinking grandiose things about
themselves-hearing, seeing, advancement, all the rest.
Whereas it’s not enough. it’s just basic practice. The real
process goes on from there.
DEVOTEE: Beloved, it seems the more profound the sadhana,
the less grandiose peoples presumptions are about
AVATARA ADI DA: Mm-hm. Truly, theres no one to have any
Another thing I was talking to the Kanyas about the other
night, which was in that recording, I guess some of you
heard it, is some matters particular to the seventh stage of
life. I was talking about the fundamental Nature of Reality,
that simply What Is, is What there Is when everything else
is eliminated. Well, broken down into it’s parts and going
deeper and deeper, you see, when you get to the place you
cant reduce to anything further, thats What Is. Hm? Thats
Every schoolboy, schoolgirl, knows, from a little bit of
science class, that all there is is light. Everythings
light, energy. it’s part of the common presumption of the
present day. With all of it’s other limitations, this is one
of it’s presumptions. it’s remarkable that it hasnt produced
any cultural changes yet. [Laughter.] Everything
just seems fleshier and fleshier and more and more stupid
and technified, whereas what is really profound about all of
that is not all this invention you can do, preoccupation you
can create, but this fundamental communication about
reality, that it’s light.
All of this is Light! it’s just one Buzz, Shakti, Hm? The
Divine Radiance. You can look at a form, get into it’s
parts, you know-the human body, lets say. Theres that
fleshiness, and then theres the chemical and molecular
levels, and atomic levels, and so forth. Eventually you get
to Light, or Energy itself . And It cant be reduced to
anything else. You cant break It down into any parts. It
doesn’t have any parts, you see. it’s fundamental
Theres one other irreducible Reality for you to discover,
likewise, and that is Consciousness. There are conceptions,
perceptions, blah-blah-blah-blah-blah-blah-blah, hm? At the
root of it all is Consciousness itselflf, and It cant be
reduced to anything else. it’s like Light. You cant break It
into parts, and theres nothing on the other side of It but
itself . Light and Consciousness are the same Thing.
Generally Consciousness is what you call the SubjectI’ve
Part of It, and Light is the ObjectI’ve Part of It. But in
reality They are One.
Reality itselflf, just simply What Is, cant be reduced to
It is Self-Existing.
it’s Inherent Nature is Radiance.
And it’s Quality is Love-Bliss, the Very Divine
I am Speaking to you now.
It is so!
But you are apparently dissociated from Me, from this
Very Condition. The self-knot, the self-contraction, is how
you’re doing that. You are doing it. This is what you must
discover, and this is what hearing is about. By entering
into Communion with Me from that position, moment to moment,
going beyond that knot, you enter into the real process of
the Way of the Heart, Which is about Realizing the Condition
that everybody already knows is True-Light itselflf,
Love-Bliss itselflf, Consciousness itselflf, the One
Infinitely Conscious Buzz that you are experiencing right
But, of course, in the midst of It, you are dissociating
from It also, so you feel this knot of contraction. But you
also feel this PervasI’ve Presence when you feel the Depth
also, in any moment that you are truly sensitI’ve,
So the process is about Realizing the Condition That Is,
Realizing My Very Person, by going beyond the self-knot,
utterly. And at first there is a lot of sequence of
purification, as I Said, going beyond distraction by mere
modifications. And then theres entering into the profound
Depth of the Self-Radiant Consciousness in the “Perfect
Of course, through that process of purification and
Spiritual Awakening, there are many changes that occur in
the personality of the body-mind and so forth that one could
call Spiritualizing. But it’s only with the seventh stage
Awakening in Which there is Inherent and Most Perfect
Identification with the Divine Self-Condition, the
Demonstration of That, through the process of Divine
Recognition, is the actual Incarnating of the Divine, the
actual Manifesting of the Divine.
So the seventh stage Demonstration is one of
progressI’vely absolute Radiance, or “Brightening”. So there
are stages to that Demonstration, ultimately to the point of
No-Noticing, Divine Translation.
DEVOTEE: And must that process be fulfilled once it’s
begun, Beloved? In other words, once the seventh stage
process is begun it will be fulfilled?
AVATARA ADI DA: Inevitably, yes. But it is a matter of
Indifference when it occurs.
it’s not that it has yet to happen, either. The
Realization is already the case. The Samadhi is already the
DEVOTEE: it’s just a Revelation.
AVATARA ADI DA: But it’s Demonstration is in the context
of conditional existence.
DEVOTEE: Transfiguration, Transformation …
AVATARA ADI DA: Yes, Indifference, and ultimately
Unqualified “Brightness”, Divine Translation.
Indifference may sound like a dull thud in the midst of
DEVOTEE: Not the way You Show it, Beloved.
The “Brightening” Way Talk Series – Index
AVATARA ADI DA: You just sort of go comatose or blank or
something. No, it is beyond the Transfiguring and
Transforming processes. It is immensely Full in the
body-mind. The body-mind is simply Radiant. And that
Radiance is magnified in the Divine Indifference stage to
the point of Divine Translation.
But this “Brightness”, this Realization of the “Bright”,
is the seventh stage Awakening.
So the “Brightness” is what I have Brought to you. Thats
What I Am. Thats Who I Am.
DEVOTEE: So, Beloved, when you’re Divinely Indifferent,
you’re just Residing in Your Love-Bliss and Giving it to
everyone? Is that it?
AVATARA ADI DA: Mm-hm. Thats it.
The inherent Nature of Light, or the Divine Conscious
Bliss, is Radiance. I was discussing this with the Kanyas
the other evening, as a way of Helping everyone to
understand something more fundamental of what the sadhana is
about. It is the sadhana of the “Bright”.
The ordinary human disposition is attached to
two-sidedness. On the one hand there is pleasure and pursued
pleasurable states. On the other hand there is negativity
and a kind of lightlessness, or darkness. And you’re
attached to a body-mind that is mortal, and that makes it
more negatI’ve in the balance than positI’ve.
And so you’re always, by tendency, literally
un-en-lightened, not lighted, not “Bright”, not Radiant.
you’re contracted, not Radiant. Radiance, however, is the
inherent Nature of Reality. So the sadhana is-I’ve used many
metaphors, like “living in My Kiln”-through Communion with
Me, self-forgetting Communion with Me, to Reside in My
Self-Radiant Position. It is to be Radiant, rather than
self-contracted. Every moment of Communion with Me is this.
And then with hearing it becomes more profound, and seeing,
and so on. But it is a “Bright” course of identifying with
My inherently Radiant Condition, and thereby being Radiant,
becoming Radiant, being Radiant yourself rather than
contracted. All of the dark, negatI’ve, egoic
“self-possessed”, mortal, and so forth lightlessness in you
must become Radiant instead. The Way is literally the Way of
becoming En-Lightened, becoming Perfectly Identified with
So it is a matter of constantly becoming Radiant instead
of contracted. On Melrose Avenue when I first began to
Instruct devotees, I would often use this gesture of closing
the fist and then opening the fist. [Beloved Adi Da
makes the Gesture with His right hand held at the center of
His chest.] Everybody intuitI’vely felt what that meant.
They knew it’s got something to do with energy and all that,
too, you know. They felt all that in My Company.
But what does that mean? You can either be contracted and
therefore dark and dissociated from the Divine
Self-Condition, or you can be Radiant, not only open but
Radiating. Hm? And the more you do this sadhana, the more
obvious the Disposition of Radiance becomes. Even the
“conscious process” becomes a non-verbal feeling beyond
contraction. You can do it in every moment relatI’ve to
everything. Instead of being darkened by the tendencies, you
can feel beyond the self-contraction and all the
So those who do this sadhana seriously, for real, become
“Brighter” and “Brighter”, literally. It is Light. It can
even be seen. By some it can be felt. So through this
process of purification, you don’t just get thinner and
thinner and more and more ascetical. You get Fuller and
Fuller, “Brighter” and “Brighter”. Hm? This is how devotees
should understand it. They always think in terms of getting
disciplined and dried up, so they always want to use
something or other to feel good. But, no, this Way is a
“Brightening” Way. It is not about self-contraction. It is
quite the opposite. it’s not about pleasurelessness, but it
is about Happiness itselflf, Which is greater than ordinary
pleasure but allows for it also.
DEVOTEE: Theres an Irish saying, Beloved, describing a
very happy person, he was so happy he was like a cat milking
AVATARA ADI DA: Milking the sun? Ah, Tcha. Thats
So when making these observations, as I Said, trying to
assist people in this LRO consideration, and as I was
telling people today, My observation-and obviously I’ve been
telling people for a long time-My observation of devotees in
general, including those who apply for this LRO matter,
suggests to Me that theyre struggling with, or otherwise
demonstrating, limitations in the real moment to moment
practice of Ishta-Guru-Bhakti Yoga. And, along with that,
theyre struggling with or otherwise neglecting the various
And the struggling with the disciplines produces drama
and lack of results in the gathering. The absence of true
and moment to moment Ishta-Guru-Bhakti Yoga just shows
itself as mediocre practice altogether.
So these are My observations of the gathering in general.
And I’ve Called for all kinds of positI’ve changes to be
made in all of that, but when I receI’ve a list of people
applying for the Lay Renunciate Order telling Me that theyre
1.3 or even actually level 2-uh, well lets put it this way,
I generally don’t find the list convincing.
DEVOTEE: Delicately put, Lord.
AVATARA ADI DA: And so in conversations such as this one
and similar ones recently, including at Sugar Bowl, I’ve
been trying to get everybody to understand what a profound
process this is, and what it is as a process. There have to
be the signs, the history of right and serious practice, and
there has to be the “Brightening”. And if you’re just
struggling with even what is Ishta-Guru-Bhakti Yoga and how
to do it and only remembering it sometimes and likewise
arguing about the diet or whatever else, and throwing
yourself into, you know, blithely into the bondage or
“bonding”, then how much even of listening is there? How
much of real sadhana?
The profound incident of what you could call hearing in
My case was insanity . I mean, all these people who are
declaring themselves to have heard Me-when was that day?
[Laughs.] It is an extraordinary Realization. I have
no doubt that devotees generally even have some sense of
this understanding, because they have My Instruction about
it and theyre doing sadhana with some degree of energy and
attention. And so they do see things getting clearer in
various aspects of their lI’ves, you know. You can say this
about devotees in general. They feel less aberrated about
this, that, and the other thing over a period of time and so
forth, so that, in other words, theyre being purified of
some aspects of their ego-routine and seeing that the Wisdom
works, the Way works. And because they can even explain that
much change in their lI’ves in the language of
understanding, then they imagine theyve heard Me, because
they could describe it as understanding and self-contraction
and avoidance of relationship and “I don’t do it now anymore
with my girlfriend”, or whatever it is, “or at least not so
much”. And so they may think that itself is hearing, because
they can describe it in the language of
it’s the little bit of the Law that casts out so much
fear you feel good about yourself, you see. But you have to
get the whole Law to hear Me. Hm? And not just the little
DEVOTEE: Beloved, thats what I felt after that
feeling-Contemplation that we did of You earlier.
AVATARA ADI DA: Mm. This evening.
DEVOTEE: Mm-hm. That there was such a profound difference
between, you could describe what You were Initiating us into
at that time in the same language …
AVATARA ADI DA: Mm-hm.
DEVOTEE: … that we read all the time in Your
AVATARA ADI DA: Mm-hm.
DEVOTEE: But the difference in the understanding of it
between the exoteric understanding of it …
AVATARA ADI DA: Mm-hm.
DEVOTEE: … at the level that You were just Describing
and the esoteric understanding of it that You Gave all of us
earlier tonight is so profound. it’s just an amazingly
AVATARA ADI DA: Tcha.
DEVOTEE: Night and day. Night and day.
DEVOTEE: Beloved, I felt there was a tacit moment of
recognition and a change in what You just Said, where we
tend to feel good about ourselves and maybe have a good
feeling and so then imagine thats hearing.
AVATARA ADI DA: Mm-hm.
DEVOTEE: And then when You asked us to feel our anxiety,
to feel the anxiety there …
AVATARA ADI DA: Mm.
DEVOTEE: And right then it snapped into something
entirely different, which was just no bullshit.
AVATARA ADI DA: Mm.
DEVOTEE: And it’s not this, you know, ideal thats going
on but this actual total recognition, conscious recognition,
of the contraction and of Your total Radiance and the Energy
that You Are. And I could feel that when I recognized that,
that it was just a matter of always surrendering into that.
Whenever this is felt …
AVATARA ADI DA: Mm.
DEVOTEE: … surrendering into that, and then it more and
more becomes that.
AVATARA ADI DA: And not surrendering merely
DEVOTEE: it’s not superficial at all.
AVATARA ADI DA: Surrendering from that very place of the
knot. And thats the unique hearing capability. Hm?
Now, before that capability truly awakens, as I Said, you
can make use of self-understanding as I’ve Communicated it
to you and various aspects of the sadhana, and be purified
of some aspects of the behavioral and emotional and mental
aspects of your life, and feel good about that-and should,
of course. it’s positI’ve. But it’s not hearing. it’s not
itself the sign of hearing. Hearing is this fundamental
responsibility. You see?
DEVOTEE: Beloved, this is the most unique difference
between Your Teaching and all traditional teachings of all
AVATARA ADI DA: Tcha.
DEVOTEE: In that those traditions generally are about our
always experiencing this not feeling good.
AVATARA ADI DA: The traditions are based on the
self-contraction. Theyre based on a search generated by
DEVOTEE: The great path of return.
AVATARA ADI DA: Yes. So it’s a progress of stages, not to
the seventh, but of developmental stages, ego-motivated, and
producing states that are ultimately egoic because they
depend on conditions. But the Way of the Heart is not that.
And I’ve been making this point over and over again since
the day I began to Instruct in 1972, and even before then.
The experiences are not it!
And then I didnt just Say that thats so. There was the
Garbage and the Goddess time, and all kinds of other times,
for that matter, in which people experienced spontaneously
all kinds of phenomena associated with all those
developmental stages of life. And then I would constantly
point out, “Thats not it. But what are you doing?”
Re-sensitizing them to themselves , to their own action
thats producing the search for those experiences or wanting
to cling to them or wanting to repeat them or make the Way
into a process for achieving such things. it’s not at all
I’ve Communicated to you the uniqueness of this Way from
the very beginning, but your grasping of it is slow. All
experiencing, and all thinking for that matter, all
conditionality, is a development of the self-contraction.
it’s a development from a place of anxious
dissociatI’veness, the ego, wanting to expand it’s sphere to
feel better and better. And ultimately what will it discover
in it’s own utter dissolution? The Divine Condition is to be
discovered. But It is simply Reality from the beginning.
So the Way of the Heart is not about that developmental
course but about the direct process, in every moment, of
Realizing the Divine Self-Condition, going beyond egoity and
Realizing That. Thats what this Communion with Me is about
from the beginning, then-the direct gesture of going beyond
the ego-knot rather than just surrendering with and as the
body-mind, founded on the ego, to have experiences.
I see still even many devotees showing the sign, even as
beginners coming for My Darshan, that what theyre supposed
to be there doing is some kind of working on themselves to
gain some experience for themselves. Whatever that might be.
Often it is obviously shown even in their bodies as wanting
to experience energy, Spiritual signs in the body-mind and
so on. it’s not that such experiences do not and will not
arise in the Way, but they are not the point. They are not
it. They are not Realization. Therefore, the process of the
Way is not a matter of seeking such things. The process is
always the one of directly transcending the ego-knot, moving
out of the position of self-contraction into Radiance, My
Thats the Way of the Heart from the beginning. Do you see
clearly the difference? [Devotees confirm that they
do.] And hearing is simply the establishment, on the
basis of all the foundation practice, the establishment of
this capability, most direct, with fullest comprehension,
fullest responsibility, so that you can do that sadhana, of
going beyond the self-knot, under all the circumstances that
may arise in the developing stages of life. They will not
then become ego-reinforcing. They will not be deluding. They
will simply be purified, like all other tendencies, and
youll move on to the “Perfect Practice”.
So I’m always trying to find more ways to put it to you.
And so you have this Literature now that is very full, and I
hope it is fully CommunicatI’ve. [Devotees praise
Beloveds Source-Texts.] Additionally, conversations
still continue from time to time.
DEVOTEE OKUN: Like tonight.
AVATARA ADI DA: Like tonight, yes. I’m always Working,
and therefore always Working to have this point become
clear, and have this understanding become clear, have the
sadhana become clear to you so that you can do the sadhana
better and know the difference between the signs that must
be there for real transitions and notions that you all may
develop otherwise somehow, that are less than that.
So I’m happy to entertain this possibility of a Lay
Renunciate Order, but these matters I’ve been putting to you
all during this last week in particular are the measure you
must make of yourselves.
Are you doing this sadhana itself that I am Describing to
you, that I have GI’ven you? Are you really practicing
Ishta-Guru-Bhakti Yoga moment to moment? Do you, if you’re
claiming to have heard Me, stand in the position of the
self-knot and right there-thats your action, you see?-feel
beyond it in Communion with Me through self-surrendering,
self-forgetting practice? Are you doing that, or not? And
you must really examine yourselves and see if it’s so. And
if it’s not so, well, it’s not 1.3 yet, but hopefully you
know better than before what the sadhana requires and are
more serious about it.
I’m not looking to not get a Lay Renunciate Order out of
this “consideration”. I’m looking to actually get one, but I
have to have the goods.
AVATARA ADI DA: What more is there to talk about
relatI’ve to this? Some of you are on the LRO list in one
place or another, and some of you are conspicuously
DEVOTEE: The usual suspects.
AVATARA ADI DA: Theres another thing I pointed out about
it that we could maybe discuss tonight, too, then. In a very
high number of cases actually, one member of an intimate
couple is on the list and their intimate is not. So I gave a
lot of Notes about that today.
DEVOTEE: We heard those before we came over.
AVATARA ADI DA: Good.
DEVOTEE: Beloved in this moment in this whole
conversation You’ve sensitized me more deeply to the
self-contraction, and also to You, more profoundly in this
moment. And once that level of sensitivity is established,
couldnt you very quickly demonstrate the hearing
AVATARA ADI DA: It seems logically so, yes. But, as I
Said, you can step out of the process. People take vacations
all the time, make the practice sort of nominal and
superficial, either consistently or in some occasions. But
if you don’t cop out, in other words if you stay with it
seriously, stay focused in it, and maintain all the
disciplines I’ve GI’ven you, yes, hearing should come about
readily, inevitably, and it shouldnt take a great long
As I said, what are the reasons why it wouldnt happen?
Why would it be delayed? it’s taking vacations from the
totality of discipline that covers everything, functional,
practical, relational, cultural. You either don’t let the
practice become intense, or you don’t let it touch
everything. This is how you let yourself off the hook.
Instead of focusing and listening to Me, in other words
focusing in this discovery of the self-contraction, you’re
looking for some gleeful or distracted alternatI’ve.
So you find this by playing it fast and loose with some
aspects of the discipline, and then you otherwise get sort
of dopey and you don’t practice Ishta-Guru-Bhakti Yoga
moment to moment. You just do it sometimes. Well, thats why
hearing could take a long time. And many of you here are
proof of it.
Some of you characters are getting old in My Company
already. I remember Rodney making jokes about this-it seems
like yesterday, but it must be twenty years ago-how in the
future, you know, sitting in rocking chairs or whatever, and
everybody would be old here together and so forth. So I
remember hI’m making remarks like this. And, well, it’s so.
A lot of people are getting up around sixty or so, certainly
into fifties. That doesn’t mean middle age or old age. Thats
part of the social message you get, every ten years move
into another social pattern and eventually consent to be an
old asshole. But for the renunciate, the decades don’t have
that psychological significance, and even though the body
itself may tend to go through some kind of changes, you
compensate for it Yogically and so forth.
Well, in other words many of you are proof, being twenty
years or so in My Company already. DEVOTEE has been in My
Company, for what is it, thirty-fI’ve years? The longest
listening process to date.
So DEVOTEE was just suggesting that once there is a basic
grasping, he was just describing that hearing ought to occur
very quickly or readily. It seems so.
DEVOTEE: Hopefully within just a few hours, Lord.
AVATARA ADI DA: Yes, but then again, why havent so many
of you who have been in My Company for a good long while,
and thats basically all here, why havent you heard Me yet,
plain old, and moved on?
Because if you tell Me you have, but I see you taking all
kinds of vacations-Ishta-Guru-Bhakti Yoga sometimes,
functional, practical, relational, cultural disciplines,
pick and choose sometimes if I see you doing that, and
you’re also telling Me You’ve heard Me, it’s not very
believable, you see.
So thats another way of saying what is My difficulty when
I get these LRO lists.
DEVOTEE: You can tell shit from shinola, Beloved.
AVATARA ADI DA: Yes. You must discriminate. So thats the
first thing I look for in devotees. Thats what it means to
go from student-beginner on to 1.1, 1.2. Thats supposed to
be the sign, the stable establishment and maintenance of all
the foundation practice. No vacations from then. So what
there is to observe, then, in the crisis of hearing are the
unique characteristics associated with that. But whats being
reported to Me in general by people who make this
application to the LRO is that theyre feeling kind of happy
about having disciplined themselves for two weeks, while
they heard My talk on Ishta-Guru-Bhakti Yoga yesterday and
theyre really intending to do it. But they don’t have the
history of even the stability that should be there in the
transition from student-beginner.
Theyve taken so many vacations that their claims don’t
sound very believable. That doesn’t mean, however, that they
cant get their act together and make that transition even
readily. And, like I Said, I have to see the goods. They
have to prove it. You have to pass the tests, not just
apologize for failing them and then tell Me you’re committed
to do better. Thats Catholic, where you constantly return to
the sanctuary and apologize, and commit yourself to doing
better. And thats all the religious life amounts to is this
constant cycle of failing of tests and apologizing. I guess
we cant say thats exactly how the Catholic hierarchy
intended people to do it, but thats how people in general do
it. They never get purified, they never get intense, they
never get profound about the religious life, and all they
seem to be called upon to do anyway is to be good citizens
or something. Basically just social morality is expected. If
you do anything more than that, as a religious person, you
get raised eyebrows.
you’re not supposed to be looking for God-Realization.
you’re supposed to be concentrating on being a productI’ve
citizen. We don’t want to see you getting ecstatic. Show up
at the office in an exalted state? I mean really!
So the usual religious message is to be positI’ve in the
social morality sense. So in the Catholic tradition, for
instance, they have the apology-recommitment cycle, in other
words, theres a conventional revision of Catholicism really,
where people just use the lesser part. So they apologize for
social infractions of one kind or another basically, and
then are asked “Are you sincere about that?”, “Yes.” And
“Okay, do a little penance and do better.”
Of course they generally don’t do all that much better,
so they just repeat the cycle over and over again. But what
it’s supposed to be about, even in the Catholic tradition,
at least in it’s origins, is a true purification-people
unburden themselves and truly change their act and lI’ve the
life of prayer and become more and more profound in their
conversion to God-Witness and God-Communion. it’s like all
traditions, fundamentally about traditional God-Realization.
But it gets turned into the message of social morality in
the common world. And thats why it seems that so much of the
time in religious history, the esoteric part has been called
esoteric because it’s hidden. It just wasnt known. Not a
It gI’ves you the impression that the common people were
denied the Truth. Perhaps in some instances that was the
case, but people just prefer the vacation. Even if shown the
Great Revelation, they still want ordinary things instead.
In other words, theyre distracted in their attention. So I
Call you to a sadhana that directly goes beyond all of that,
and I’ve GI’ven it to you in every detail, and when people
tell Me that theyve heard Me and so on, I know what I’m
And you all have to know what you’re about. You have to
use My Teaching fully, and make it your Law and your
measure. If you do, then, yes, this hearing crisis should
Today we were talking in our meeting [Beloved met
earlier in the day with DEVOTEE, DEVOTEE, and DEVOTEE
Bouwmeester] that from the beginning to hearing should
maybe be, about a year and a DEVOTEEf seems reasonable.
Student-novice for six months, and then a student-beginner
for six months, 1.1, 1.2, on to 1.3 in another six months
seems like a reasonable period of time over all, for
somebody who is truly serious and doesn’t take
So a number of you have been around for a long time and
havent heard Me yet. This is why. You’ve been peripheral in
your disposition, and rather casually you take vacations
from discipline and so on, don’t maintain the focus, and you
just wind up spinning your wheels instead of hearing Me. If
you really were serious, and could readily establish whats
supposed to be required for mature student-beginner, then
you should have basic certainty that in six months youll
have heard me and move on from there. If you don’t take any
more vacations, six months ought to be enough for that, with
the year You’ve already had behind you, or more, in the
student-novice/student-beginner process, where you’re
supposed to be adapting to this foundation practice.
So My feeling about most of the people on that list, so
far in our consideration anyway, is that they could be as
little as six months away from it. In other words if they
really are serious in this moment, they should be able to
readily establish this full student-beginner obligation and
then in about six months should have heard Me. In other
words, I feel they are some kind of student-beginner,
basically, but could move beyond that readily if they got
So thats what I was looking for when I asked you for that
second group, the intensI’ve group. I knew there would just
be a small number that should be proposed as having actually
come up to level 2 now. So I wanted a proposal that would
cover the whole worldwide gathering in a short period of
time, reasonably short period of time. So I wanted people on
that list from each region.
it’s hard to say at this point how many, if any, will
come through this process and actually be part of the LRO
now. But if at least that whole group and maybe even some
others got involved in this intensI’ve, and really got
straightened out with the foundation practice right away,
and worked with one another intensI’vely, certainly many if
not all of them should move on to 1.3 within the next six
months, or in as little as six months. But I don’t see a lot
of the signs I’m looking for just generally speaking about
that group. I see many deficiencies which I’ve described
tonight, and in recent days. But it is a consideration, and
if somebody can prove it to Me, fine.
But I don’t take this transition to 1.3 or otherwise
level 2 lightly. Obviously, to rightly propose anybody for
this transition you have to have been involved in a true
cultural intensI’ve with them. And with their intimate, if
they have one.
Today I called all those who are considering this matter
to study the LRO vow, because it clearly describes lay
renunciate practice as a renunciate practice. it’s not just
a householder practice, as opposed to real renunciate
practice. it’s a renunciate order, made up of people who
generally practice in the lay circumstance but not as lay
people in any conventional sense. So the Lay Renunciate
Order vow describes complete renunciation in the case of
it’s members. They are here to relinquish the bondage of
“bonding”, to everything and everyone. So to do that
practice in intimacy requires a profound Yoga. How can that
Yoga be done and all the obligations of the Lay Renunciate
Order be done, if you are involved with an intimate who is
not such a renunciate?
That other one would always have some kind of demands,
expectations or whatnot, but also would be practicing in a
different disposition, not only in sexual intimacy but in
all aspects of the relationship, one reinforcing at least to
some degree something less than full renunciation. Otherwise
why wouldnt he or she choose to do so, to embrace renunciate
So thats why I was reminding everybody today about this,
because the intimates of many people were not on the list,
on any of those lists. And nobody mentioned it to Me, as if
it had importance. There seemed to be an impression that
single individuals can apply to the LRO, even if theyre
involved in intimacies. But, no, the general rule is that if
you’re practicing in intimacy, your intimate must be
involved in that same sadhana, and that there may be
exceptional cases individually, where
The list I got today was more or less the general rule.
You could apply just yourself without your intimate, or not,
it didnt seem to make a difference to those who gave Me this
list. If you are a renunciate in this Way, you’re entered
into a profound consideration relatI’ve to everything. And
therefore you are involved in a profound consideration with
your intimate. So you cant lI’ve two lI’ves as a member of
the Lay Renunciate Order. You have to lI’ve one-pointed.
The difference in the Lay Congregationist Order is not
that theyre not practicing authentically. I expect them to
practice authentically. But they are, generally speaking,
probably encumbering their lI’ves with lots of thiss and
thats and other things, that don’t allow for the kind of
intensI’ve of practice expected in the renunciate
And also they may have difficulty straightening some
things out, like for instance this matter of intimacy.
Fundamentally to move on to the renunciate practice, Lay
Renunciate Order and so on, you have to transform your
intimacy into Yoga. That means you have to see to it that
your intimate is transformed like everything else. And thats
part of your test of qualifying for the renunciate order,
that you and your intimate can show up at the same time,
prepared to do the same thing. Otherwise, what the hell are
you up to? Intimacies? Stay in the Lay Congregationist
So if you’re doing the work, it works, and you cover
everything, you see. Nothing is outside of the sphere of
renunciation for a true renunciate. So, individuals who do
real sadhana and who are involved in intimacy with one
another turn one another into renunciates, or certainly into
authentic devotees. This is what they support in one
another. This is what they oblige one another to do. Now, if
either one neglects it, then it becomes a relationship
purposed to serve egoity in one way or another, or
conventionality, which is basically the same thing, in and
of itself .
Do you want to talk about something else, is that it? You
had the bliss part of the evening, and now you’re having
reality talk, and you want to get back to the bliss part?
DEVOTEE: This part isnt as blissful.
AVATARA ADI DA: Oh, yes? Well, I’ve Said enough about it,
I think. But what we were initially considering was not your
failures of sadhana and so forth, which we just completed
Getting back to the first two parts of our consideration,
the first was feeling beyond mind, perception, all the rest,
and entering into the Feeling of Reality directly. And
you’re all doing that for a while. And then we began to talk
again, and you confessed noticing the limit on your ability
to feel thus profoundly. So I’m interested in talking about
sadhana being about going beyond that, but in this Way of
“Brightness”. In other words, theres a constant
“Brightening” or change in the disposition from
self-contraction to Radiance.
Then we talked about your failure of it, your failure to
do that. And you wanted to lay on to Me this hearing
transition stuff, based on something else entirely, not this
Radiance, and having gone through that real sadhana, but
some other positI’ve changes you want to feel good
But the more limitations you place on this practice of
going beyond the self-knot, the more distracted you are by
other things and so on, the more you delay the course and
the more you oblige yourself to endure dis-ease. Sometimes
without noticing it so much, because you desensitize
yourselves. You simply will not go beyond this inherently
uncomfortable, painful sensation of existence thats at the
root of everything you do and think. And youll lI’ve inward.
it’s traditionally been called many things, including the
state of sin, which means to miss the mark. You’ve become
dissociated from the Inherently Radiant “Bright”, the
Blissful Divine Self-Condition, and became a seeker instead,
you see, instead of a Realizer.
So to practice this Way, you have to do the work of going
beyond the ego-knot itself . It is a Graceful process
because it’s done in the form of Ishta-Guru-Bhakti Yoga. It
is a “Brightening” process, a sort of Radiating process, not
merely a cutting away or a cold process, emptying merely. It
is the Way of Fullness, of “Brightness”, of the “Bright”
But to lI’ve it, you cant just dance around with
conventional religiosity. You must enter into real Communion
with Me at the root of the knot. And you must do this
consistently. And you cant do it if you take vacations from
the whole round of disciplines I’ve GI’ven you that covers
everything. And you cant do it without practicing true
Ishta-Guru-Bhakti Yoga moment to moment.
So I expect all devotees to understand what I’m talking
about and make the culture altogether right on this basis.
And this LRO consideration has to go on taking these matters
seriously and establish an intensI’ve of those who can move
on to the LRO in the next six months or so. And then
otherwise discriminate between them and some others you may
feel who are truly qualified to move on, instead of just
presenting Me a bag of who knows what? Horse manure.
Do you have any questions about all of this, or any
excuses? Excuses for whatever You’ve been doing instead? Or
what? Anybody got anything to say about any of this? Besides
DEVOTEE: Sounds really good, Lord.
AVATARA ADI DA: It sounds really good, Lord?!!!!! I cant
believe it! Twenty-three years later, this extraordinary
Ordeal, and the voice comes out of the gathering
representing all, “Sounds really good, Lord.” Cyrano was at
some sort of a gala, and some guy thought he was going to
get really snotty with him. He stepped up to hI’m after much
prodding from his friend and gesticulated with a
handkerchief, and said to Cyrano, “Your nose is rather
large.” [Laughter.] You know that play, right?
AVATARA ADI DA: It was really funny. Of all the things
that could have been said, in other words.
We could just do the whole thing all over again. Ill talk
for twenty-three years to say all the things I did Say
before, but in order to say what you could have said.
DEVOTEE: It could be an interesting thing to try, Lord.
SDEVOTEEl we begin?
AVATARA ADI DA: Sadhana?
DEVOTEE: Beloved, I feel like what we considered thus far
this evening, I don’t think this is just a casual
conversation, or something we got just in passing. I’ve felt
the thread of this since that most extraordinary guided
AVATARA ADI DA: Tcha.
DEVOTEE: But since that time I’ve continued to feel this
same realization that I noticed there in the very beginning,
which was different for me. I really felt the difference
between what I generally engage in and think is real
practice and real recognition of You. And then that actual
moment that I got to and continue to feel in the moment
since the beginning here, of feeling the contraction but
also feeling Your Radiance so “Bright” and beyond it, and
feeling like if I can just stay in that-staying in the
process always and not taking vacations-I can feel how that
can be very quick process.
AVATARA ADI DA: Well, thats what it’s supposed to be.
DEVOTEE: Thats what it’s supposed to be.
AVATARA ADI DA: I’ve GI’ven you the process, and I’m here
to quicken it, you see.
DEVOTEE: It happened very quickly.
AVATARA ADI DA: But then you have to do what I Say. If
you want Me to Do what I Do, you have to do what I Say. You
have to do the sadhana.
DEVOTEE: Master, thats why I value these times with You
during these occasions so greatly, because it’s such a Gift
and a lesson for me.
AVATARA ADI DA: Tcha.
DEVOTEE: And I thank You.
AVATARA ADI DA: Tcha.
Now, I accept those thanks. But prove it.
DEVOTEE: Yes. I hear You, Lord.
AVATARA ADI DA: You’ve had a lot of time around Me here,
along with a lot of others. Then this matter is very direct.
Simply establish the practice I’ve GI’ven to You. It is very
direct, because it’s not dependent on the kind of
accumulations and artifices associated with the
ego-developmental religiosity or ego-developmental
esotericism, whatever you want to call it, which is just
buzzing with distractions all the time.
There are many reasons why this Way is quick. But it’s
because it’s focused on this one matter and not a lot of
distractions. But somehow or other you reverse it. You make
the establishment of all the foundation practices into some
sort of a thing in itself and don’t stay one pointed in what
this listening to Me is really all about.
We use these kinds of occasions-weve done them in the
past and hopefully now-to focus on real listening to Me. The
ancient texts are called “upanishads”, or some of the
ancient texts, a group of them are. It means “at the foot
of”. Well, what does that mean? it’s to be established in
the discipline at the Feet of the Master and to listen, and
hear and see, and Realize. So if there is an occasion such
as this, or any occasion of consideration with Me under any
circumstances, you should use it rightly, use it to your,
So let this consideration serve real hearing in you. And
whatever correction you have to make in your practice, let
it serve your absolute commitment to doing so.
I’ve talked to you many times about point of view-being
in a position of the separate personality, but as a
psycho-physical personality-and how this governs your sense
of reality, as long as you’re not entered profoundly into
the reality process. Your presumption of a separate point of
view in space is the naI’ve realism of your daily life. Your
sense of reality in space is determined by this being fixed
as a physical body in it. You see? And so you are perceiving
the room to be however it looks to you. But somebody else
sitting in another place in the room is doing the same
thing. But the room doesn’t look to that one exactly as it
looks to you. It has some general likeness, of course, but
it’s a different view altogether, even if it’s the same
room. And that ones perception of the room is just as
authentic as yours. it’s not that one of you is seeing the
room rightly and the other is experiencing an illusion. So
both of those perceptions of the room are true. And so as
you add all other perceI’vers, they all have a different
view of what the room is, just as authentic as yours. And
all of them are true.
What does the room really look like, then? Because the
room itself exists in all kinds of terms. And yet it doesn’t
exist merely as you are perceiving it. It exists as it can
be perceI’ved from absolutely every point of view, and not
only from every point of view in space in the room but from
every point of view in space-time. Thats the condition of
the room. And yet you are not experiencing the room as such.
you’re not experiencing the room itself . you’re simply
perceiving it from a point of view.
Just consider what the room itself looks like. And yet it
DEVOTEE OHKI: This would really be true in terms of
subtle experience also, then, I mean obviously.
AVATARA ADI DA: Any kind of experience, you see, …
AVATARA ADI DA: … in the mode of a separate
personality, is a partial view, a point of view, and not an
awareness of Reality itselflf, even the conditional reality
itself . You are not aware of this room as it is , and yet
the room as it is exists.
Contemplations such as this are profound, because I’m not
just Calling you to imagine something like a blue elephant.
I’m Speaking to you about a Reality that you all share and
need not invent. But It is itself profound beyond your usual
DEVOTEE: And we don’t know what it is.
AVATARA ADI DA: Mm-hm. Not only don’t you know what it
is, you cant even perceI’ve it.
DEVOTEE: You cant feel it, touch it, taste it.
AVATARA ADI DA: Right. You cant think it. You cant
DEVOTEE: Master is that the equivalent to what You were
describing earlier as withdrawing to the point of infinity,
perceiving it from that point of view, except in the
AVATARA ADI DA: Withdrawing to the point of infinity?
Well, I don’t like the word “withdrawing”, really.
DEVOTEE: Well, You described it earlier. Reducing, I
think You Said reducing to the point of infinity.
AVATARA ADI DA: Yes. You can reduce anything you
perceI’ve, break it down into different physical components,
chemical, molecular components, atomic components.
Eventually you get to That of Which all of it is a
modification, or a level of appearance. It is Light itself .
You cant reduce Light to anything further. Or Energy, you
cant reduce It to anything further. It doesn’t have any
parts. It doesn’t have a deeper part. There is nothing on
the other side of It.
Likewise, if you enter into the domain of you own
psycho-physical self-awareness, you go through all the
levels of it-the physical, the blood, the chemicals, the
molecular structure, the energy levels, states of mind-you
get to Consciousness itselflf, and you cant reduce It
further. Theres nothing on the other side of It. It has no
By investigating the objectI’ve, you get to the point of
Light. By investigating the subjectI’ve, you get to the
point of Consciousness. And They are the same Thing. They
are irreducible, fundamental Reality. They are to be
Realized most profoundly, but this consideration is
available to you even now, regardless of your stage of
practice or Realization.
If you investigate physical phenomena or everything
objectI’ve, you find Light. Right? [DEVOTEES: Yes.]
Anybody have any doubt of that? it’s the same Consciousness
through the subjectI’ve investigation.
Well, these are ways of entering into the Ultimate Sphere
of Reality, and that is the Sphere in Which the room exists,
but even now.
DEVOTEE: Beloved, could we go back to “you cant feel it”?
Somebody was saying we cant feel it.
AVATARA ADI DA: Yes, I assume DEVOTEE must have been
saying it. He was talking about using emotional states to
contact it. Feeling itself is another matter.
DEVOTEE: It was when we were talking about Consciousness
itselflf-you cant see it, you cant-
DEVOTEE: We were talking about the room itself .
DEVOTEE: But is that what were agreeing, that one cant
AVATARA ADI DA: No.
DEVOTEE: No, I don’t agree to that.
AVATARA ADI DA: Cant feel what exactly? The Divine
DEVOTEE: One cant feel Radiance? I wouldnt say that thats
AVATARA ADI DA: The Radiance of Consciousness is what you
DEVOTEE: And Love-Bliss, though? doesn’t that-isnt
AVATARA ADI DA: The Inherent Nature of It is Love-Bliss.
It is Self-Existing Consciousness, Self Radiant. And it’s
Nature is Love-Bliss. It is the “Bright”. It is Me. This is
what you must Realize in Communion with Me.
Well, to do so, you cant just strain your eyeballs to
find the room as it truly is. You have to go beyond point of
view. You have to directly transcend egoity.
it’s not that then, necessarily, youll be having
perceptions, some extraordinary perceptions, of the room in
some unimaginable condition that you couldnt describe, but
rather youll Realize the Condition in Which the room also
Exists Ultimately, the Divine Self-Condition, Conscious
Light of Divine Being.
So to Realize Me, you must transcend point of view,
self-position, egoity, the separate position. You cannot,
through any exercise of the separate position or the
body-mind, Realize the Truth. The body-mind is simply a
modification of That, like the room itself . it’s a
complexity, or a maya, that cannot be comprehended.
So rather than exercise the separate self, as if to
Realize the Truth in the manner of the “great path of
return”, you see, the separate self is directly transcended.
That is the “radical” nature of this Way that I have GI’ven
So thats the work you’re here to do. Thats the sadhana
you’re here to do. And you must have a clear understanding
that it is so, or you will re-invent the Way, as you all
have done, individually, even collectI’vely-re-invented it
in your own likeness or according to your own egoic
disposition, instead of adhering to My Word and maintaining
this profound consideration moment to moment, and doing so
in the context of embracing all the disciplines I’ve GI’ven
you. Then you are involved in the direct listening
See, the listening process is not just struggling with
the practices, the disciplines, all that. Thats all just
something to do. The listening process is this profound
consideration, engages Ishta-Guru-Bhakti Yoga, making use of
the technical elements of practice, of the “conscious
process” and conductivity”. The disciplines and such are
simply the order, the structure, within which you do this
profound consideration, because you cannot become profound
in it or one pointed in it if you don’t simply establish
those disciplines covering everything. Therell always be
vacation-land for you.
So it has always been My expectation, even, that you
would embrace all these disciplines, all these forms of
practice, and enter seriously, profoundly, into this
consideration, and move on through these stages, get on with
this process. But individually and collectI’vely You’ve been
rather retarded about it.
Obviously, then, a Lay Renunciate Order must be made up
of people who are most profoundly engaged in this Yoga of
ego-transcendence, for real, rather than just being people
who are really in the world of the first three stages of
life and want the religious life to essentially be a social
order and a cultural distraction, a cultural consolation. So
I Call all My devotees to this seriousness, and the formal
renunciates must be the most exemplary. And others should be
moved to do likewise.
To really be in touch with the self-contraction in this
Communion with Me is to be on the verge of hearing. It
shouldnt take long, if you drop your vacations and just stay
on the job.
DEVOTEE: Every time we find You, Beloved, we drop the
vacation right away.
AVATARA ADI DA: Tcha.
If You’ve heard Me, then you’re in that position of your
own making, that knot you’re making, or that pinch you’re
giving yourself. And you cant get rid of it, you cant shake
it. You don’t allow yourself to even make an effort in that
So it is tapas. It is a profound ordeal. At the same
time, it is full of absorptI’ve Communion with Me and all
the things associated with right life.
You must constantly be dealing directly with this
self-contraction. And if you are in touch with it, then you
don’t like it. You want only this Communion with Me. You
don’t want this self-contraction, but you’re having to feel
it every moment. And it’s your doing, you see. it’s kind of
in a spasm. You’ve got to do the sadhana to relax it and be
full of Me, so that My “Brightness” Radiates through it and
releases it quickly.
So if you have heard Me, you don’t want to spend a lot of
time getting beyond that knot, because it’s not comfortable
at all. You become profoundly sensitized to it if You’ve
heard Me, and likewise profoundly sensitized to Me. Thats
why seeing is next.
But the knot is there, and it’s unavoidable, and you
don’t like it. It is pain. It is fear. This is what makes a
renunciate out of people, the discovery of Me and the
self-contraction at the same time. In full hearing and
seeing, thats what makes people renunciates, because it is
pain. it’s extraordinary pain, at the same time
extraordinary bliss but the pain is where you sit, and you
are moved to feel out of it, and be relieved of that
enclosure, that divorce from the Divine, that sinfulness.
You dislike it so much, you dislike that knot so much, that
you become utterly concentrated in going beyond it. it’s not
that you have to just sit in a room all the time, but you’re
just all the time feeling beyond it, practicing the exercise
of going beyond self-contraction into the state of Radiance,
Love-Bliss, Energy, Light. And you would not be distracted
from It, because you do not want to be simply sitting in
that pain of self-contraction.
This is basically what Rudi was referring to, not really
knowing altogether what He was talking about. He just wanted
to deal with this incredible stress, frontal stress. But
it’s the ego-knot. You cant bust it from outside. You cant
relax the body that much. You have to deal with the root of
egoity itselflf-it’s in the conscious domain-and in
Communion with Me move beyond it. You cant just work on the
body-mind. You have to find out the ego-act, and exercise
the flower constantly, every moment.
But it is a pain, and it’s associated with lots of
adaptations that keep producing results somehow. So you’re
always going to have to feel beyond egoity itselflf, but
also all of it’s results. So that makes it an ordeal of
pain, of tapas, which you endure because you’re also in
Communion with Me and have My Wisdom. But it’s still pain.
Hm? But you become intelligent with it. You know what you’re
doing and can make this exercise of going beyond the
contraction, the self-contraction.
In the process, there are things to be endured and felt
beyond, and thats a purifying process. But you would not-if
you really truly have heard Me and are sensitI’ve
altogether-you would not have that take a long time.
Now up to 1.3, you don’t want to waste much more than the
weekend getting to the “Perfect Practice”. If you really
heard Me, it’s an urgent matter then.
DEVOTEE: Beloved, I wanted to thank You, like everyone
else has, for that guided meditation. It was so Graceful.
But at one point You were suggesting that we allow ourselves
to feel that speck of egoity, allow ourselves to just feel
that, the epitome of egoity.
AVATARA ADI DA: Mm-hm. You liked that reference, didnt
DEVOTEE: Well, yeah, I did.
AVATARA ADI DA: It made some sense to you.
DEVOTEE: It did. Well, I just had an instant response to
it, because I felt this spot immediately. It was right,
right, bodily right here …
AVATARA ADI DA: On the right side of the heart, you’re
DEVOTEE: Yeah. It felt like a black spot, though.
AVATARA ADI DA: Mmm.
DEVOTEE: And the more I allowed myself to feel into it,
the more I felt it was like utter pain, torture, disease,
suffering. It was everything in that speck. it’s everything
that I fear, everything that I avoid, because it’s so
intense. And for me I got-
AVATARA ADI DA: Do you feel outside the speck or inside
DEVOTEE: I was outside the speck-well, I don’t know.
There were some points I wasnt sure, but I could see it
visually. But then I would get overwhelmed by it so I don’t
know exactly where I was.
AVATARA ADI DA: Well, to feel like it’s inside you, or
feeling that psycho-physical result, is to be outside, is to
objectify it. To be inside it, on the Source side of it, is
what hearing is about. And at the same time that it’s a
knowledge of a knot, it’s a knowledge of how to go beyond
it. it’s a most fundamental self-understanding to realize
that you are always in the position of manufacturing this
pain and can feel beyond it.
DEVOTEE: I’ve never felt the overwhelming strength of
that so fiercely as tonight.
AVATARA ADI DA: Tcha.
DEVOTEE: I’ve experienced this bindu that shes talking
about, this place, too, recently.
AVATARA ADI DA: Thats to be outside it, as I just said.
it’s not wrong. it’s just a level of finding it, of locating
it. Any of you could perhaps, by some exercise of attention,
feel something about the right side of the heart. That
doesn’t mean that you’re established in that position.
DEVOTEE: Oh, I didnt feel it there.
AVATARA ADI DA: Well, she was talking about it, DEVOTEE
DEVOTEE: Well, thats just where it was.
AVATARA ADI DA: But the profound transitions in practice
are about being inside, or at the Source-Position.
The exercise of hearing, then, is to be sensitI’ve to it
as contraction itselflf, to be in the position of the pain,
not outside it or avoiding it but actually in that position.
It is not comfortable at all, not likable. It has all kinds
of artifacts-physical, emotional, mental, and so forth, even
in the breath. So the self-contraction itself is fundamental
pain altogether, disturbance altogether, and ordinary life
is motivated by it, because it is so profound, and it is
detached from the fundamental Reality, the Divine Reality.
It is lost in maya, in appearances, presumptions, even
imagining that you are seeing the room, whereas in fact
you’re just seeing one little view.
So it’s confusing. you’re not seeing Reality, then.
you’re seeing an appearance associated with your own egoity.
You cant be in another position. You cant be in the position
of the totality of the room. What position are you in? Some
self-enclosure of thoughts and perceptions.
So it’s very uncomfortable to make this discovery of
egoity. But as I said to you earlier, it’s not truly
profoundly discovered except in the condition of Grace, of
Communion with Me, and reception of My Teaching, and then,
it’s in that total context that the ego is located also.
Thats hearing, the true discovery of the self-knot,
coincident with this whole process of Communion with Me,
full of the Wisdom of Instruction that you apply.
What about that?
DEVOTEE: I think you’re talking about the matter of
hearing includes, then, this reception of You.
AVATARA ADI DA: Mm-hm. I know what we were talking about!
[Laughter.] I wanted to know if you had a response
DEVOTEE: Beloved, I feel, like You’ve always Said,
feeling-Contemplation of You is primary. The first thing you
have to do is “Locate” You before you can even become
sensitI’ve to the self-con traction.
AVATARA ADI DA: Yes.
DEVOTEE: It seems the whole listening process is just
staying with that feeling-Contemplation of You, but along
with whatever the body-mind goes through.
AVATARA ADI DA: But always gI’ve Me the leading
faculties. don’t be played upon by these natural arisings.
Even the intensity of converting life to sadhana can
sometimes produce more arisings, reveal more things, that
require to be purified or made “Bright”, which is what
purification is really all about.
Once you dare to allow yourself to hear Me, then the
process becomes intensI’ve and profound. Maybe you have some
sense of that, those of you who are taking a long time to
get to that point. And thats why you’re taking vacations.
it’s even a kind of fear of the self-contraction, a fear of
becoming aware of the limited nature of your experiencing,
and then the mortality that you’re locked into because of
that. you’re afraid of it. you’re not merely afraid of it.
It is fear.
DEVOTEE: It is fear.
AVATARA ADI DA: You don’t want to be afraid, so you
distract yourself and minimize your awareness of this. But
you must stand in that position. That doesn’t mean to go
insane with fear or anything like that. it’s about being in
that place where you make this knot, this fundamental
discomfort. Yes, it has the characteristic of fear, but you
basically experience that fear as a kind of anxiety in the
pit of your stomach or something.
If you are but really-in touch with the self-contraction,
you do experience the anxiety that is the constant
underlying everyones behavior, everyones moment to moment
existence. They just build all kinds of stuff on top of it
and desensitize themselves, but the self-contraction is the
quality of anxiety, stressful anxiety, and so on.
So, as I Said, you may want to forestall that
realization, because you cant get rid of it once you got it.
Once you get bit, thats it. Unless you find yourself out,
you cant escape it. And so thats when the sadhana really
begins, you see. Thats when it starts becoming effectI’ve at
a profound level. Before then, there are life-improvements
and so on, fine. But this is how the sadhana gets
intensified, quickened, full of light, full of heat,
And it should then be quick to the “Perfect Practice”.
But it requires the Spiritual transition So there is the
basic minimum of the level 2 and level 3 process, as the
means for moving on to the “Perfect Practice”.
Most devotees, as I said, wont have anything to do with
levels 4 and 5. Some might. Some will have experiences
certainly associated with the ascending process. But very
few will actually do sadhana in the context of the fourth or
the fifth stages of practice. They will do the sadhana in
level 2 and level 3 and move directly from there to the
Level 2 and level 3, then, for them will be just this
fundamental true seeing of Me, not a tour of experiences but
an entering into My Spiritual Sphere, so that I can Attract
you into the situation of the “Perfect Practice”. Those who
make much of the experiences otherwise will add time and may
in some cases have to practice at level 4 or 5, or both,
You see even student-beginners and so on having-even
apparent to all-experiences, kriyas and all kinds of things
going on with them. But thats not seeing Me. Those are
effects, and they can be sought or clung to and whatnot, and
become means to delay the course like anything else.
So those who are involved in the seeing Yoga may very
well have kriyas and so on as spontaneous happenings, but
theyll be focused in this direct Spiritual “Locating” of Me,
gI’ven up in Me utterly, because of the foundation of
hearing, so that you can be entered into the Source Point of
the “Perfect Practice”. To engage in the “Perfect Practice”
you must be at the Source Point of egoity, not on the other
side of it, wandering in the body-mind. To Awaken to the
Witness and then enter into the profound “Perfect Practice”
is to Stand on the other side of the ego, and the focus of
the practice is no longer dealing with the body-mind,
feeling beyond egoity in the mechanism of the body-mind.
it’s a matter of entering directly into the Self-Radiant
Sphere of Divine Being.
Of course it’s done most profoundly in meditation, where
you separate yourself from other matters. And so, even
though the practice is also engaged in a fundamental sense
in every moment, there still is, after the profound
meditation, return of ordinary associations.
And the associations will not necessarily themselves
change all that much. it’s in the seventh stage of life, the
third stage of the “Perfect Practice”, that the
Source-Position itself is Realized utterly, and no
conditions are placed on It. It is not held in place by
anything whatsoever. So the gesture of dissociation drops,
and the “Bright” Realizer Expands into the sphere of the
body-mind. And through the process of Recognition, all
aspects of the body-mind are “Brightened” by that already
Realized Condition. So someone engaged in the “Perfect
Practice” in the context of the sixth stage of life shows a
very different sign than a devotee who will have Realized Me
in the seventh stage of life.
So once you truly hear Me, once you get the taste of all
of this, you will not want to delay the course. Everybody
has their own manner, and the imperfect qualities of the
body-mind in it’s adaptations, so everybodys sign in the
course is different. Some may be, in their depth, apparently
more a renunciate than others and so on, or more
intensI’vely involved in all the aspects of practice than
some other. If theyve truly heard Me, they all practice from
the same disposition and would not delay the course.
it’s just like if you’re ill, you don’t want it to last.
Maybe sometimes you don’t mind feeling a little woozy, a
little sniffly, and hanging around in bed all day. But if
you’re really sick, you don’t want it to go on. Well, to
hear Me is to be really sick, you see. [Laughter.]
it’s to get really sick, at the same time really well
altogether and knowing what to do, but otherwise really
sick, really in touch with the ego-act and it’s result and
it’s disposition and so on. And you do real work with it,
because it’s such an urgent matter. You don’t want to be
sick anymore. Thats how sick you have to be, in other words,
to have heard Me, because it is a profound motivator, a
Brightening Heart Series