Chapter 23 – The Dawn Horse Testament




Notice

This 1991 version of
The Dawn Horse Testament is NOT the final version by
Adidam (Adi Da).

“you should not
study any earlier edition of The Dawn Horse Testament (or
any earlier edition of any other of My
“source-Texts”). The final edition is it. There are not
“multi-editions” or “mutil-instructions”.
“I am taking great care to prevent the falsification and
transformation of the Reality-Way of Adidam – all of this
kind of make-it-up-as-you-go-along do-it-yourself
“religiosity” and revisionism.

Adi
Da Samraj 2004




The
current and latest 2004 edition of The Dawn Horse Testament
is out of print. It is not entirely “current” with Beloved
Adi Da’s final language conventions and the details of His
practical Instructions. Since their is no final or official
version available Beezone feels it appropriate to use this
1991 version as a form of study with the understanding of
the above ‘notice’.

The
Dawn Horse
Testament

The Testament Of
Secrets
Of The Divine World Teacher
and True Heart-Master,
Da Avabhasa
(The “Bright”.)

November
1991

read
original (with Capitalization and
Parentheticals)

 


Chapter 23

Observe Your Separate and Separative Self
Understand your separate and separative self, and freely
surrender the ritual of your separate and separative
self

The first actually seeing stage of the Way of The Heart
requires a profound exercise of the frontal personality that
submits, opens, and rightly polarizes, purifies, balances,
and infuses the frontal or human character. In that process,
the human and spiritual limitations of the frontal character
are to be constantly encountered and surrendered via
directly and effectively self-transcending devotional and
spiritual communion with me.

This real process of encounter and self-surrender
inevitably produces many kinds of phenomenal signs. Even
some signs related to the ascending spiritual process may
spontaneously appear, but the significant signs that are
specific to the first actually seeing stage of the Way of
The Heart are associated with the descending process. Thus,
the significant phenomenal signs at this developmental stage
include psycho-physical openings and releases everywhere in
the frontal line, spiritually relieving egoic mental,
emotional, and physical patterns, reactions, and blocks in
the hierarchical structure, from the head to the bodily
base.

The self-contraction shows itself, in the context of the
frontal line, in a hierarchical pattern, progressing from
the head to the bodily base via a range of specific emotions
and bodily and mental states that generally prevent
spiritual communion with the divine love-bliss that is
native to existence itself. In the first actually seeing
stage of the Way of The Heart, my devotee must be already
equipped to immediately and directly transcend these various
states that generally prevent spiritual communion with the
divine love-bliss. Therefore, in the first actually seeing
stage of the Way of The Heart, the spiritual process of such
self-transcendence is primarily engaged relative to patterns
of self-contraction that merely diminish , rather than
prevent, direct communion with the divine love-bliss.

The head is associated with mental patterns that reflect
the emotional and physical conditions below, and, in the
context of practice in the first actually seeing stage of
the Way of The Heart, my devotee discovers that the primary
mental sign of the self-contraction, whereby spiritual
communion with the divine love-bliss is diminished, is the
habit or tendency of non-specific doubt.

Immediately below the head is the region of the throat.
The self-contraction registers in this region as tendencies
either toward the diminishment of psycho-physical equanimity
or toward a degree of suppression of bodily energy and human
aliveness.

The general region of the heart is associated with
emotional patterns that reflect conditions everywhere in the
body-mind. The self-contraction is displayed emotionally as
every kind of chronic and key emotion, or pattern of
emotional reaction, including fear, sorrow, anger, and
un-love, but the maturing spiritual practitioner of the Way
of The Heart, in whom hearing, seeing, and the advancing
spiritual process of ishta-guru-bhakti yoga have already
purified the heart in its average of moments, discovers that
the primary emotional sign of the self-contraction is
boredom.

If heart-boredom is suffered, the objectless doubt is
also made to seem. Or if the doubt appears, heart-boredom is
likewise suffered. And if the mind of doubt and the heart of
boredom are suffered, the entire body-mind is expressed by
either chronic or variously ranging signs of discomfort.
Therefore, in the case of spiritually awakened devotees in
the Way of The Heart, these three are the always
simultaneous moods and signs that may tend to appear.

The devotee in the first actually seeing stage of the Way
of The Heart discovers that the ordinary struggle with
concrete doubts, negative thoughts, emotional reactions, and
grosser bodily discomforts is superseded by the true
spiritual ordeal of frontal communion with my spiritual
presence of self-revealed “bright” love-bliss, and by the
grace-given process of feeling beyond the primary signs of
doubt, boredom, and discomfort.

Therefore, even though the true devotee in the first
actually seeing stage of the Way of The Heart may sometimes
be obliged to transcend the lingering “grosser” resistance
of the body-mind, the primary and constant ordeal is the
ordeal of direct and immediate spiritual communion with me,
and this is done on the basis of true and basic
psycho-physical equanimity.

The characteristic mood and the basic character of the
egoic individual in the first three stages of life are
developed in terms of what i call “vital”, “peculiar”, and
“solid” personality patterns. These patterns correspond,
respectively, to reactive strategies of either a
characteristically vital kind or a characteristically
emotional kind or a characteristically mental kind.

The dominant characteristics of the “vital” character are
obsessive and compulsive vital-physical self-expression and
the chronic, excessive, and even degenerative dramatization
of bodily self-indulgence. The “vital” character is also
associated with diminished emotional capability, and it is
generally represented by either mental dullness or a chaotic
display of the conceptual function.

The dominant characteristics of the “peculiar” character
are excessively “romantic” and idealistic expectations and
the loss of balance via chronic emotional hypersensitivity
and the dramatization of exaggerated “mood swings”. The
“peculiar” character is also associated with diminished
conceptual or intellectual capability, and it is generally
represented by either suppressed or chaotically displayed
vital-physical functions.

The dominant characteristics of the “solid” character are
hyperactivity of the conceptual mind and the chronic
dramatization of a profound and even suppressive need to
control the psycho-physical self, and others, especially via
the efforts of the conceptual mind and the effects of merely
conceptual expression. The “solid” character is also
associated with diminished or suppressed vital-physical
activity or capability, and it is generally represented by a
suppression of emotional expression.

Even though many individuals may seem to express
themselves in a complex fashion, combining two or more of
these chronic egoic strategies, every egoic individual is
basically dominated by one of these three reactive designs.
And the characteristic mood or effort determined by each
design dictates the characteristic expression of bodily
energy and human aliveness via the region of the throat.
Thus, the “solid” character tends toward suppression of
bodily energy and human aliveness. The “vital” character
tends toward a chaotic expression of bodily energy and human
aliveness. And the “peculiar” character tends to swing
between chaotic and suppressive expressions of bodily energy
and human aliveness.

Insofar as these egoic strategies simply represent the
ordinary and spirit- preventing efforts associated with the
first three stages of life, they must be observed,
understood, and transcended during the three periods of
intensive listening and hearing practice, and the capability
of those egoic strategies to prevent heart-communion with
the living spiritual divine is finally undone in the
eventual awakening of true seeing. However, insofar as these
egoic strategies represent only the spirit- diminishing
tendencies of the humanly adapted frontal personality of the
spiritually awakened devotee, they may continue to be
responsibly transcended and released in the truly and fully
spiritually active practice of the Way of The Heart.

Deeper than the head and the throat, and central to the
body-mind as a whole, is the heart. In the case of the
seeing devotee practicing the Way of The Heart in the fully
established “basic” context of the fourth stage of life, the
left and the middle regions of the heart are functionally
evident, but the right side of the heart is only latently
evident in the egoic individual previous to the transition
to the sixth stage of life.

The heart-region of the egoic individual functions as the
primary seat of functional emotion and of spirit-energy. And
the heart-expression is retarded by the self-contraction, so
that it becomes characterized by a range of non-spiritual
and diminished spiritual signs, from the absence of
spiritual awareness to the spiritual “disease” of diminished
spiritual delight. And the self-contracted heart is also
characterized by a range of emotions associated with
un-love, or non-love, or ego-based and superficial
pseudo-love, or diminished love.

The spiritual yoga of devotional self-submission of the
frontal personality is first to purify, rebalance, and
regenerate the head, throat, and heart regions of the
frontal line. In that initial process, chronic doubt,
boredom, and discomfort, love-bliss-diminishing aspects of
“vital”, “peculiar”, and “solid” character-strategies,
love-bliss-diminishing suppression or chaos of bodily energy
and human aliveness, and love-bliss-diminishing emotional
expressions of un-love and non-love and pseudo-love and
diminished love, and all other forms of diminished
heart-expression and heart-delight are to be progressively
released, and these are responsively to be replaced by the
mind of sat-guru-praise and god-aware happiness, and by
spiritual equanimity, and by fullness of both human
aliveness and spirit-life, and by the heart-radiant
disposition of self-transcending love.

Once the initial spirit-work of the Way of The Heart has
become significantly effective in the frontal line of the
body-mind, the spiritual yoga of devotional self-submission
of the frontal personality can then “break the navel”, and,
thus, spiritually purify, rebalance, and regenerate the
deeper or base regions of the frontal line.

The deeper or base regions of the body-mind are
associated with the root-reactivity of the born personality.
That root-reactivity is represented by anger, sorrow, and
fear. These great and base reactions are not commonly
experienced in the daily course, and, therefore, in general,
they do not directly and effectively either prevent or
diminish spiritual communion with the divine love-bliss. The
more superficial patterns, including occasional and lesser
expressions of fear, sorrow, and anger, are commonly
indulged, but the great base reactions are commonly
suppressed, even though they are at the root of all
superficial reactivity and all conventional patterning.

Spiritually untouched anger, sorrow, and fear are the
dark or hidden side of the heart, whereas the less
aggressive expressions of fear, sorrow, anger, un-love,
non-love, pseudo-love, and diminished love, as well as the
ordinary chaos or suppression of bodily energy and human
aliveness, and also even chronic doubt, boredom, and
discomfort are the commonly dramatized side of the heart.
Therefore, in the Way of The Heart, it is only when the deep
reactive base of the heart is invaded by my baptizing,
purifying, rebalancing, and regenerative spiritual presence
that the frontal personality is most fully restored to
superior equanimity, and to optimum clarity of awareness,
and to constantly capable feeling-responsibility for mental,
emotional, and physical negativity, and to truly fundamental
love.

This process of total frontal invasion by the
spirit-current of love-bliss does not itself require the
most debilitating revelation of base fear, sorrow, and
anger, but the process directly involves and requires the
deep opening of the base regions of the frontal line of the
body-mind to my spirit-presence of love-bliss itself. And
the fullest restoration of the frontal personality to the
divine love-bliss itself is the primary sign that is to be
realized in the fully established “basic” fourth stage of
life in the Way of The Heart.

Only when chronic anger, sorrow, and fear are capably,
directly, and effectively released can it be said that the
first three stages of life are complete. And only when the
degrees of ordinary anger, sorrow, and fear that prevent
heart-communion with the living spiritual divine are also
spiritually released can it be said that the fourth stage of
life has truly and fully begun. Therefore, practice of the
Way of The Heart in the spiritually responsible context of
the “basic” fourth stage of life cannot be truly and fully
established until, by grace, chronic fear, sorrow, and anger
are transcended, and until, by grace, true seeing is
awakened or established.

Fear is the primary mood of separation. Fear is
especially associated with the first stage of life and the
vital shock of birth. It is signalled by the gaping mouth,
as if the mothers teat were suddenly torn from the infant
lips.

Fear is also the principal motivating mood of the “solid”
character. Paradoxically, the obsessively self-controlling
and other-controlling “solid” character is founded on a fear
of being controlled by others. And that fear is originally
developed in the years of infancy, childhood, and
adolescence, generally in a passive and rather infantile
reaction either to the feeling or to the actual experience
of being too much controlled and threatened by others,
especially adults.

Sorrow is the primary mood of the rejected individual.
Sorrow is especially associated with the second stage of
life, the loss of self-security, and the loss of power over
others on whom one depends. It is signalled by the grimace,
the downturned and puckered mouth, as in the eliminative
anal grunt, the end-game of oral dependency.

Sorrow is also the principal motivating mood of the
“peculiar” character. The alternately idealistically
self-controlled and chaotically self-indulgent “peculiar”
character is founded on a basic and sorrowful feeling of
being neglected. The chronic sorrow of the “peculiar”
character is a yearning to be effectively touched, or loved.
It is a call and even an hysterical need to be controlled,
or restored to balance by a positive controlling influence.
And that sorrowful need is originally developed in the years
of infancy, childhood, and adolescence, generally in an
hysterical and rather childish reaction either to the
feeling or to the actual experience of being neglected,
denied love, and denied a positive controlling
influence.

Anger is the primary mood of reaction to all that seems
to justify fear and sorrow. It is especially associated with
the third stage of life, the adolescent struggle with the
motives of dependence and independence, and the aggressive
effort toward genital victory. It is signalled by the
tortured mouth with gnashing teeth, the facial display of
genital shapes and genital agony. Everything of the first
three stages of life is displayed in common egoic anger.
Even egoic sex is full of rejection and anger, threatened by
loss and sorrow, and convinced of fearful separation.

Anger is also the principal motivating mood of the
“vital” character. The “vital” character is
characteristically self-indulgent, vitally, or physically.
The mood of this pattern is always rather rebellious.
Indeed, even the most apparently carefree, self-pleasurizing
“vital” character is dramatizing resistance and refusal. The
“vital” character is founded on an angry reaction to
controls and demands. The characteristic behavior pattern
associated with the “vital” character is a chronic effort to
resist, refuse, or avoid the controlling influence of others
on the personal bodily existence of the conditional self.
And that angry mood is originally developed in the years of
infancy, childhood, and adolescence, generally in an
aggressive and rather adolescent reaction either to the
feeling or to the actual experience of being too much
controlled and threatened by others, especially adults.

Truly human and adult maturity requires transcendence of
the chronic and obsessive character patterns developed in
the years of infancy, childhood, and adolescence. Truly
human and adult maturity is the achievement of a balance
between the motive toward control of the psycho-physical
self and the motive toward motion or excitation of the
psycho-physical self. Truly human and adult maturity
requires self-control and a willingness to be even
physically affected, emotionally touched, mentally
influenced and thus, to a significant degree, controlled by
others. Likewise, truly human adulthood or maturity requires
the constant exercise or excitation of the motive of real
freedom.

The tendency to perceive existence as a problem, or to
conceive and suffer an inherent conflict between control and
freedom, must be transcended in wisdom. The father-force and
the mother-force must both be discovered, accepted, and
integrated into the psycho-physical patterns of your own
real existence. When that integration is real and stable, so
that the human pattern of your own body-mind is basically
balanced, intelligent, self-disciplined, and also directly
communing with spirit-life, then the transition to practice
of the Way of The Heart beyond the limits of the first three
stages of life has really been completed, and practice of
the Way of The Heart in the spiritually responsible context
of the “basic” fourth stage of life has been granted a full
and stable foundation. Therefore, it is this both human and
spiritual foundation that must precede the transition to the
formally acknowledged first actually seeing stage of the Way
of The Heart.

There is no fullest integration of the frontal or
ordinary human personality until the divine spirit-presence
fully infuses the surrendered body-mind with love-bliss.
Therefore, by grace, the wandering and self-contracted heart
must find its own true father and mother.

Even the total body-mind must cling to the divine
life-light, calming breath and mind in love-bliss, if the
ego-self and others are to be sublimed, all well. Therefore,
by grace, the wandering and self-contracted heart must find
its own true husband, the father-revealing and
mother-revealing son of the only source of all and all.

The heart must surrender itself in listening love to the
husbanding “bright” companion, and this love-surrender must
become a truly hearing and seeing yoga of devotion.

The heart that hears and sees must meet the husbands
spirit-mark, and many signs must appear before the work is
“bright” and done.

 

read
original (with Capitalization and
Parentheticals)

 

The Dawn
Horse Testament – Table of Contents