Tightness and Doubt – Beezone Library

Water and Narcissus – Franklin Jones (Adi Da Samraj),
1969

I am prone to a feeling of tightness, particularly in the
heart and stomach, but also in other areas. It is anxiety or
doubt of being or in being. Life and death, both principles
are necessary and operative in me and all other
particularities. Thus I can work to create good
conditions is a failure with regard to reality itself. It is
a desire to escape the death side and thus to flee from the
dual nature of existence. In me it manifests as a will to
paradise, to ecstasy in imagination, to distraction and
fascination. It is the way without faith or peace.

This fear, anxiety and doubt seems necessary, for in fact
all future conditions are indefinite. However, these
perceptions are not created by the fact of indefiniteness
but a desire to escape it. They want to create a kingdom of
certainty, of absolute pleasure. Thus I pursue all forms of
knowledge and fascinating experience. I am in endless
thought, erotic imagination, etc. This is a failure to
accept the death side as necessary and identical to the life
process. It is a refusal to die any death. But when this
flight is truly seen, then one can be free of fear, anxiety
and doubt with regard to ones very being. Energy can
be directed into the life enterprise itself because one sees
that its dual aspect is necessary and that life, peace and
freedom are to be realized only by a concentration within
the awesome duality. Then formerly we found only death by
fleeing death and embracing a phantom life, but now we will
know life in growing degrees by embracing the certain
principles of reality.

Franklin Jones (Adi Da Samraj) 1969 – Water and
Narcissus

Note:

Adi Da wrote the Water and Narcissus 1967-1969 and
completed it in New York. At that time he had come back from
India and was on his way to Los Angeles. This is prior to
his realization at the Vedanta temple in 1970.

This selection covers basic areas of Adi Da teaching
–
vital shock,
fear
of death, dual
aspect of life, doubt
and the desire
to create good world conditions.

Due to copyright restrictions Beezone is limited
in its ability to present any more of this talk.