This Is the Vision I Have Felt Since Birth – Bubba Free John (Adi Da Samraj) – Beezone – Vision Mound Magazine


Vision Mound Magazine – index

Jubilee Issue

vol 1 no 5

November 1977

This Is the Vision I Have Felt Since Birth

an essay by Bubba Free John


To view “I am not the body” is false. “I” is the whole body-being. The false view is upheld by spiritualists, Vedantins, and other subjectivists. But it is simply a false implication or presumption that appears on the basis of an otherwise true intuition.

If the “I”-thought is considered in terms of the “field” in which it arises, there is direct intuition of the Condition of the “I”, thought. ‘ That Condition, so Realized, is called the Atman, or the Self, and is considered to be not only different from the “I” thought but from all other thoughts and all other objects. But this Self is not truly or radically other than or exclusively independent of any object or thought. The Self is not other than the body. It is simply the intuition of the Condition of the body.

The “I” thought is not “I”. “I” is a sense that arises, prior to thought and coincides with the whole body-being. It may not be reduced to the thought “I,” since thought is only one kind of modification, a permutation of only one aspect of the whole body-being. To arbitrarily select a mental object, intuit its ground, and then exclude the object, even all objects from the ground is a conventional, strategically reductive approach to Truth. When it is done to the point of absorption (Jnana Samadhi) its limitations must ultimately reveal themselves. Thus, Jnana Samadhi is followed by Sahaj Samadhi.

In Sahaj Samadhi in its true or full form, the Self is Realized to be not other than or exclusive of the world, the body, the mind, or even the “I”-thought. The Self, or the intuition of the ground from which the “I’ thought and all other conditions arise as modifications, is not radically independent from the body or any other condition. It is simply the Truth or Condition of the body and all other condition.

The difference indicated here is that between the subjectivist view and the whole body view. The Condition of conditions is not truly known in itself, exclusive of objects. The Condition of conditions is their Truth, or the right Realization of conditions. The subjectivist holds on to the Self, via intuition or analysis of the ground of cognition, to the exclusion of objects, because he is already convinced, on the basis of his strategic approach to Self-Knowledge, that the Self is other than the objects that arise. Thus, he seeks to abide in exclusive Samadhi, indifferent to mind, body, and world. But this exclusive disposition is itself a strategic tension that must yield to more perfect or radical intuition. When that occurs, the exclusive view of the Self is released.

From the non-strategic or non-problematic whole body view, the Condition of conditions is not ultimately Realized by excluding objects or conditions from their ground. Such is only, at best, a preliminary approach to the ultimate Intuition. The Truth is not interior to the body. It is the Condition of the whole body-being. Thus, that Condition is the native view toward or relative to the whole body-being and all conditions. Once established in that view (in Sahaj Samadhi), it is not a matter of excluding (or strategically including) any conditions. If they arise, they arise, and exclusion or inclusion are only arbitrary considerations. The essential matter is that arising conditions must be Realized in terms of their Condition (the Self, or nonseparation from unqualified Ignorance-Radiance).

Thus, true Self-Realization does not imply exclusion of objects or the body. Rather, all objects arise as modifications of that Self. “I” is not itself interior to the body (as the “I”-thought appears to be). Therefore, the Condition of the whole body-being or “I” is not ultimately Realized by reductive and exclusive interiorization. Rather, in Sahaj Samadhi, all arising, and all aspects of the whole body-being, are Realized to be only modification of the Condition of all conditions (not just the Condition of the “I”-thought).

Thus, ultimately, Enlightenment is not a matter of the exclusive within. The Truth is not a matter of going within the whole body-being but of establishing the whole body-being and all other or relative conditions in their Condition. That involves whole body Sacrifice into the Condition of conditions. It is the Way of Radiance, or Love. At last, Enlightenment is a matter of the Destiny of the whole body-being, not the exclusion of the whole body being from that Destiny. Even the flesh must be Translated into Light. We must be Transfigured in the Divine through Surrender. Our Intuition must be radical. That is, it must Realize not only the ground of thought but the body itself must be converted. This is the Great Mystery. Love must not be prevented by detachment, inwardness, and illusory exclusive peace. Love is the Way. When we awaken from ego and inwardness, we must yield as the whole body-being into the Infinity of Radiance and allow ourselves to be dissolved beyond fear into the Condition of even the body and the room. This is the Vision I have felt since birth.

September 20, 1977


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Jubilee Issuevol 1 no 5