Holy
Mutterances
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In the midst of a serious Discourse about Sacred Art, and the fine arts in particular,
Sri Gurudev was asked by a devotee if He had ever sculpted.
He made an exaggerated face, miming the effort of
remembering, and squinted up at the ceiling.
After a time, He turned back to the questioner for clarification of the question:
You’re talking apart front My Work with devotees!
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Anybody who gets up in the morning, brushes his teeth,
and goes outside is asking for trouble.
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Death only ruins one day of your life.
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Relax—nothing is under control!
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The womb—the only nine months of continuous growth
that most people have ever experienced.
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There is more to Enlightenment than meets the third eye.
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Middle-class people never die, they just grow old enough to go unnoticed.
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Blame a cucumber.
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The “solid”‘s prayer”: Dear Lord, send more information.
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In response to a presentation by a devotee on Socrates and Plato in which
she quoted Socrates’s statement, “The unexamined life is not worth living”:
The unlived life is not worth examining.
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In response (on the telephone) to devotees’ request for His Darshan:
I’ll fax it to you!
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How did you think you are going to get Enlightened—
by rubbing two sticks together!
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At the end of a gathering in which Sri Gurudev made a strong Call
to His devotees for greater practice, as He was rising from His Chair to leave,
He Said, with raised eyebrows,
It’s been a pleasure doing business with you.
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Then as He walked up the steps into Indefinable, Sri Gurdev turned His head
over His shoulder to look back at us and Said,
I love these Incarnations.
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Dealing with devotees is something like flower arranging.
No matter how good you do it, it only lasts a couple of days.
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Luckily for you, I have a sense of humor.
originally published
The Free Daist, Fourth Quarter, 1993