Consent to Be That Which You Are



of Santosha Adi Da (1995-1996) – Gathering “Considerations”
with Beloved Adi Da Samraj, at Sugar Bowl Ski Resort and the
Manner of Flowers, December 29 and 30 1995, and January 3,




A Gathering “Consideration” with Beloved Bhagavan Adi Da,
in the Manner of Flowers, on January 6, 1996.






(2.1) DANIEL: My question, Beloved, was, its to do with
the self-contraction. And last evening You took us through
locating the core of the self-contraction, doing the
practice of feeling to You, and, you know, also at the same
time not trying to get away from or recoil from the
self-contraction at its core.




(2.2) AVATARA ADI DA: Mm. I feel a Commentary coming on.
[laughter] Your way of stating that, you see,
illustrates the difference between listening, or not yet
hearing, and hearing. You were talking about it as if in
effect you were relaxing the self-contraction, almost like
its a knot in your solar plexus or something, in Communion
with Me. Thats how you were using the exercise. And thats
how it would be done from the point of view of




(2.3) The point of view of hearing is at the point of the
self-contraction, the point of the act of self-contraction,
and in Communion with Me passes beyond directly, is
flowering truly, not efforting against the self-contraction
as if its somewhere else or someone else or a mechanism
apart from you, just a sensation youre experiencing. Its not
merely a sensation youre experiencing. It is an act you are
performing. You are doing the self-contraction. It is not
merely happening to you.




(2.4) Ive used the illustration since the earliest days
of a man pinching himself-you all know that one, right? And
hes uncomfortable and so forth, and tries to shake it
off-whatever he does-and then eventually discovers hes been
pinching himself all the while and he takes his hand away
and all his problem disappears.




(2.5) Well, Ive used that little bit to try to describe
to you what hearing is about. Its not a matter of your
dealing with a something thats objective to you in the
context of your human existence. Its not objective to you.
It may seem to be so, in some sense, until you hear Me. And
thats the fundamental description of the difference between
non-hearing and hearing. In the case of the non-hearer, you
dont yet, at the place itself, understand most fundamentally
that your search, your dis-ease, your struggle, and so on,
your pain of existence, is something that you are doing




(2.6) So thats hearing. From that point, you can, in
Communion with Me, pass directly from the self-contraction,
the act itself. And you can do this, then, under all
circumstances, in every context of experience, no matter how
the stages evolve from then. The same hearing gesture is
your capability and your responsibility, and immediately, or
very quickly, prepares you to do the Yoga of seeing Me, such
that the hearing process is taking place in the full
dimension of Spiritual existence. Then the purification is
more profound and final.




(2.7) So what was I responding to you about, Daniel?




(2.8) DANIEL: You were indicating to me that the way I
was talking was an indication of the listening process.




(2.9) AVATARA ADI DA: Yes, the non-hearing disposition.
You were referring to the self-contraction as a something
you would not avoid. You were referring to it in objective
terms as a something rather than as your own action. Youre
not speaking from being in the position of the
self-contraction, but youre referring to the
self-contraction. Youre having some experience of it. But as
if you are outside it somehow, somewhere, and dont quite
have the key, then, to get rid of it. So you examine each
piece of your life, and you see how you do it there in some
behavioral or other terms or what not, and you work on that
some, discipline it and so forth, and that gets better. But
theres still this disturbance, this stress, this pursuit,
and so on.




(2.10) Your examination of all that becomes summary. You
become established in the knowledge of the act in the place
of the act itself, such that it is entirely, immediately,
always available to your relinquishment of it, because you
are it, youre being it, youre doing it as an action, youre
in that very place and you know all about it, just like you
know how to open your hand instead of pinching yourself, or
open your hand instead of making a fist.




(2.11) So at least by your brief description, then, what
you did last night was the listeners version of that
exercise. Unless youd like to retract your statement




(2.12) DANIEL: No, no.




(2.13) AVATARA ADI DA: But it is useful for Me to point
out how you are using language, because it says something
about your disposition, perhaps. Sometimes it may say
something about your miscommunication or not fully
“considering” your words, but otherwise its a reflection of
your meanings, your disposition. So that is what you said
suggested .




(2.14) DANIEL: It was also part of my question, as well,
which is how to always return to the core of the
self-contraction rather than just being, you know-which is
what Im normally in-the superficial, more superficial




(2.15) AVATARA ADI DA: Yes, thats another example of what
I was just saying, “how to return to the core of the
self-contraction”, when you are always right there doing it!
Its amazing, you see! Its like the man pinching himself. Its
just as mysterious. I mean, how stupid-a guy sitting there
pinching himself! Its a really very apt example of what
youre all doing. Its just as silly as that. Just as
mysterious-why would you be doing this?




(2.16) So youre right there doing it, its the core of all
of your doings, your thinkings, your feelings, and so on,
and youre doing it right at its root, all the time, and yet
you act like its totally mysterious to you. Even though I
point this out to you, it seems totally mysterious to




(2.17) Youre used to experiencing your self-contraction
as an experience rather than as your own action. So you have
some feeling about what Im talking about when Im talking
about the self-contraction, because its that knot in the pit
of your stomach or that feeling of anxiety. You dont realize
its you pinching yourself, you doing that feeling of
anxiety, you contracting. You may, in the course of the
listening sadhana, get a little better at it all, you know,
understand it a little better. But, ultimately, to
understand most fundamentally and to be free of all the
wanderings and vacations and so forth and the effects of
self-contraction-to notice, to feel, and be in the position
of the act itself -it coincides with the feeling of
relatedness itself, they are coincidental, and the arising
of attention.




(2.18) The feeling of relatedness, or the self-knot, can
be felt all over the body. But if you feel it at its point
of origin, its on the right side of the heart. The right
side of the heart is not simply the domain of Divine
Self-Realization. Its the root of egoity. Its a knot that
must be opened. You have to get back to that Door, by
releasing energy and attention to do so.




(2.19) But in general you all experience it as a knot in
the pit of your stomach or a feeling of anxiety, a stressful
feeling of being separate or dissociative and so on. Well,
its like any other symptom, then, in the body-mind, like a
sore foot or a headache or something. Its a symptom in the
body-mind. You observe it objectively, and you decide youll
do this, that, or the other thing about it. You try to relax
and breathe deeply, be more straightforward-whatever you
have to do to become more functional about it, but on the
other hand it doesnt go away.




(2.20) DEVOTEES: [murmuring] No.




(2.21) AVATARA ADI DA: [Beloved chuckles.] So you
must enter into this profound practice Ive Given you, which
includes this “reality consideration”-perpetual for the
individual, sometimes you act together in groups. You must
use that sadhana for real, to get to this point of
fundamental understanding.




(2.22) So initially you clear with all of the thiss and
thats in your life, and you confess them and you discipline
them, and so forth. Its very complex. Then you start zeroing
in on particular things-you know, emotional-sexual this,
whatever-bring some more discipline to those, you see. Its
covering all the bases, all the bits and pieces of your
life, applying all the disciplines Ive Given you. The same
purpose as the “reality consideration”. And you just become
more and more sensitive to something about all of that thats
got a root or thats the same. Its some basic thing. The
matter of understanding the self-contraction becomes
deepened, less of a superficial “consideration”. It becomes
a deeper “consideration”. You begin to get a feeling for
this something that youre always doing. You get closer and
closer to feeling it rather than feeling its effects




(2.23) Then, mysteriously-it cant be pointed out in terms
of a particular chapter in a particular educational course
or something, its not a particular moment that can be
foretold exactly, or predetermined, even-but somehow, in all
of that listening and observation, disciplining, you
suddenly understand it. You understand it because youre in
the position of it, not just peripheral to it, examining it
kind of like a symptom. You somehow, you suddenly feel the
thing, the position itself, and realize that this is what
youre doing, this contraction, and its universal to your
life. It affects everything. All youve been looking at is
all the symptoms of it. But its just this one thing. Its
there directly in your view, it can never be lost again.




(2.24) But with that knowledge, because youre standing in
that place, you get the knowledge, the capability, to
directly feel beyond it into Communion with Me, not through
relaxing this and that or working on this and that, but in
place. Thats where you have the capability, as well as the
knot. And thats when sadhana is made profound, you see. When
you have that hearing capability, you can enter into this
Samadhi of Communion with Me directly, constantly.




(2.25) Of course, thats, then, the primal readiness for
seeing Me. And it must be true. Or all you get is Spiritual
effects. And you wont see Me. [silence]




(2.26) Now, some of you have been around Me for a long
time and have liked doing the basics, just some of the
basics of sadhana, with a little picking and choosing, but
doing this sadhana in the context of the first three stages
of life, with a little bit of the fourth thrown in when you
smile at Me or offer Me a gift. [Sounds of discomfort
from devotees.] So youve been conventional religionists
and cleaned up your act a little bit in ordinary human
terms, and all become boring middle-class people now. Its a
step higher than you were [laughter] two growling
decades ago. But that cant be the end of it.




(2.27) That means you have to intensify the sadhana and
do it for real and not pick and choose, but do as I Say if
you want Me to Do what I Do. Handle your life business,
fine, but keep it as simple as possible, and be occupied
with Me in real practice.




(2.28) I mean, to tell Me it takes two decades or more to
hear Me is just total bull. Do you know what I mean, Craig?
It doesnt take that long, unless you oblige it to take that
long because you vacation from most of the sadhana. And you
can make it last forever. And you can make the beginners
culture the only Way of the Heart there is. Effectively,
thats whats been happening in this gathering. Youve
substituted the Way itself in its Fullness, youve
substituted for that a beginners religious culture with
nothing beyond it. But still, it became a thing in itself
and started transforming the Way itself in the process. And
people were mainly preoccupied with matters associated with
the first three stages of life, as I Said.




(2.29) What has been your principal conversation with Me?
I mean, I keep talking about the Great Matter and whatnot,
but what you want to talk about is money, food, and sex, and
everything ordinary, and your problem with this and that,
and your emotional-sexual endlessness. Since youve had a
discussion with Me-apart from what Ive introduced into it-
your discussion with Me has been about things related to the
first three stages of life. Ive had to spend a lot of time
addressing those things because youre so inventive, so
clever, at finding ways to make that all very




(2.30) In the process, of course, I went on and on about
everything and didnt limit My Self to your questions. You
asked all kinds of questions, but the questions that were
really your questions were about the first three stages of
life. Then theres a lot of babble, religious talk and
high-falutin stuff, too, you know, because Ive Spoken about
those things and youve read My Books-the few that are in




(2.31) [to the small group gathering with
Beloved] I was referring to just about all of you, I
guess. Youve been around Me for a good long time, some
twenty years or more. Are still 1.2 or less. I know exactly
how that happens. I just Said how, right? Hm? Didnt I?




(2.32) DEVOTEES: Yes.




(2.33) AVATARA ADI DA: You remember what I Said.




(2.34) DEVOTEES: Yes.




(2.35) AVATARA ADI DA: So theres this nominal revision,
revised form of the Way of the Heart thats been practiced up
here in northern California, Ive noticed.




(2.36) Better sharpen up My boot end. You dont seem to be
able to feel it at this distance from Fiji!




[Someone whistles.]




(2.37) DEVOTEES: Whoo!




(2.38) AVATARA ADI DA: I could take the boot off and just
sharpen up My toenails. [laughter]




(2.39) So you have this minimally organized religious
society here, religious community here, which has picked and
chosen from My Teaching, selected some congenial beginners
stuff, enjoys endlessly contemplating emotional-sexual
problems, never wants that seminar to come to an end. And
the next thing you know, twenty or more years have passed,
and your body is falling apart, and you want to talk to Me
seriously about hearing.




(2.40) Of course, that doesnt apply to you all. Its just
total bull, and we should talk about something else, right?




(2.41) So what were we talking about, then, apart from My
lapse into criticism? What was it? You pushing your
self-contraction around, like a wagon.




(2.42) Well, hearing is to stand in that position, as Ive
Said so many times. And if you stand in that position, you
also know what to do about it and that you can do it. Its
only when youre outside it, like the guy pinching himself
and doesnt know hes doing it, that you cant do anything
directly about it. No matter how you relax or treat it or
pleasurize yourself, its still there. Its only when you take
your hand away, when you stop doing the act thats the root
of all that. But you have to be in the position of that act
to know it is your act and know how youre doing it. Then its
as simple as opening your hand.




(2.43) Its not merely a matter of working on the
self-contraction from that point. Its that now you have
greater arms to Commune with Me, directly. Hm? The Communion
with Me is what the process is really all about, but you
have to deal with the impediment. Thats your




(2.44) So as I was Saying to you last night, if youre
really serious about not liking to be afraid, then you have
to get really serious about sadhana. I know Craig doesnt
like to be afraid. [laughter]




(2.45) NINA: Oh, yeah, we know that!




(2.46) AVATARA ADI DA: Hes a major non-fan of fear. He is
the president of the anti-fear club. So I know he doesnt
like it, and thats what we were talking about last night,
you know. If you get in touch with your basic sense of
resistance in association with the body, you feel the fear
of it. Its a steady anxiety. And you really dont want to be
in certain kinds of circumstances. The fear, somehow
suppressed into the form of anxiety, just motivates your
entire life.




(2.47) But what is your life really all about? You dont
want to be afraid, you want to be happy. Hm? But youre
exercising the body-mind in order to somehow immunize
yourself against this fear, and youre not dealing with the
thing itself. And its inevitable that circumstances will
arise that will be frightening. Theres just no way to avoid
it, unless you just go out like a light bulb all of a




(2.48) Theres all kinds of things to suffer, you see?
Theyre inevitable. So Ive Given you the Way truly beyond it.
But you have to practice it as Ive Given it. And you cant
merely be occupied with lesser or more peripheral aspects of
it. You have to get that act together very directly. Do
whatever your right service requires, and so forth, but be
serious about this practice. Make it profound. If you really
dont like fear, why would you make any other choice?




(2.49) Its good to not like fear. Ramana Maharshi, for
instance, hated it. He hated it so much he only let it
happen one time. [laughter]




(2.50) NINA: And that was sufficient!




(2.51) AVATARA ADI DA: [laughing] Its true! He
was a kind of sleepy-headed kid and sort of dull and all
that and sort of not emotionally involved in some basic way.
And so He never really was afraid. Then He was in His teens,
and He was hanging out in His room, whatever the hell He was
doing. [laughter] [Beloved Adi Da laughs.]
And He certainly had what could be called an anxiety attack.
A fear attack. And it was so profound, so sudden, He couldnt
do anything about it. So He had to let it happen.




(2.52) All this happened rather spontaneously, as He
said. In other words, it was an event that happened
suddenly, spontaneously. It wasnt that He was making mental
calculations and decisions. It just happened. He became
totally afraid. And it was the fear of being the body-mind,
the fear inherent in that.




(2.53) So, in that very same instant, then, He felt how
He, Himself, was not the body-mind. And He wasnt the fear,
therefore. He was, like Daniel was saying earlier,
thoughtless feeling, the Self, meaning in His case the
Transcendental Self, the apparently Boundless-but
nonetheless, in some basic sense, individuated also-Being,
in that perception, in that sixth-stage perception.




(2.54) Of course, He had some intuitions beyond that,
moving in the direction of the seventh stage of life. So Hes
a unique Sage. But in His Case, everything fundamental about
it occurred spontaneously, in a flash, because He got more
terrified than He ever cared to be again. And so He-and He
knew that that fear was inherent in psycho-physical
existence and identification with the body-so He found the
Source right then and there. And why? Because He hated fear.
He didnt ever want to be afraid again. His sensitivity to it
was so profound, He allowed it to be so profound, that He
became utterly unwilling to live on the basis of being
anything that could be afraid.




(2.55) Well, that was profoundly serious for anyone, not
just a teenager. But it was an uncompromising unwillingness
to be afraid. It epitomizes all, epitomized all suffering to
Him. It epitomized to Him what life is. No matter how you
jiggle it to pleasurize yourself or be amused or be a good
citizen or whatever you do, no matter what you do with the
body-mind, it is still grounded in this fear, this anxiety,
because it is mortal, its limited. I mean, you feed yourself
listening to the news a lot, I guess, and watching TV-and
even beyond your own experience-you get more and more
impressions about how bad it can be. Youre loading yourself
up with these impressions with all your so-called
entertainments and even manner of living in the ordinary




(2.56) NINA: Its all a meditation on that.




(2.57) AVATARA ADI DA: So you try to jiggle yourselves
into being consoled even though youre afraid-reduce your
anxiety, but its a foundation stress that informs the entire
body-mind, makes a whole life. Its inherently afraid. You
can learn techniques to relax yourself beyond it and relax
into the way things happen, and so forth-good, thats better
than nothing. But its possible to be utterly Free, One with
the Very Divine, Happy without qualification, without cause.
No separation whatsoever.




(2.58) So if youre serious about your reactions, then you
can get serious about sadhana. But you all also try to cool
down your reactions. Youre trying to be immune-without
becoming bizarre, hopefully-to the very thing that you have
to become sensitive to in order to get serious about the
whole matter of being free of the thing you hate:
Godlessness, separation, fear, struggle, seeking. You dont
like any of that. You propagandize yourselves into somehow
accepting it or liking it, or somehow seem to stay amused or
amuse one another as best you can.




(2.59) But to be identified with this mortality is not
amusing. You try to make it amusing. You delude yourselves,
but it is not amusing. If you were sensitive to the
fundamental non-amusingness of it, then you would become
serious about practice. You just think youve got all kinds
of ways out, things to do, or things youre supposed to do,
or, you know, social directives, or who knows, whatever.
Youre occupied with all of that, using it always to relieve
stress somehow, make the body feel good to be.




(2.60) You can get a moment here and there of that, but
even in any state of pleasure, you must do this Yoga. And
you will notice, then, that even in the most extraordinary
states of pleasure, the same disease remains. You want to
use the pleasure to avoid this sensitivity, but if you do
this sadhana, you wont. You will discover it, discover the
inherent root-stress, suffering, pain, anxiety, and
unsatisfactoriness of existence as youre presuming it. Then
you get serious about finding this act, being in its
position, sensitive to it, not avoiding it, discovering what
is the root of your entire senseless life of suffering and
struggle and fundamental anxiety and fear!




(2.61) It is your own action, from the beginning, at the
root. Everything that follows is not merely karma happening
to you. You see? Its the result of insisting upon the
ego-position. Transcend that, then the so-called karmas have
no force.




(2.62) Getting serious is not just about getting earnest
in some willful mental sense. Its about allowing yourself to
be sensitive to your real existence, as you experience it,
what its all about. And as Daniel was saying earlier, and
youve all said to Me one time or another, you came to Me for
some great reason, presumably not wanting to suffer further
and be bewildered and wanting really to become involved in a
process of going beyond all of the suffering and seeking and
stress as you experience life. Youve all said that thats why
you came to Me.




(2.63) But then, having come into My Company, you start
vacationing or becoming ordinary or still milling around
with the base rather ordinary business of life and making it
last forever to get it straight. And yet you still suggest
to Me that you have some great purpose for being in My




(2.64) Which is your greater impulse? To serve that great
purpose, devote yourself utterly to it? Or to have an
ordinary life, with its pursuits and satisfactions and
dissatisfactions and sufferings? You dont really want much
to do with that, so youre hoping for just a lot of
pleasurable life. But its a different choice than the one
your confession to Me suggests. You tell Me you have this
great purpose, and I Give you My every Word about everything
about it, and then still you choose a mediocrity, a mediocre
revision of the Way. And find all kinds of reasons why you
dont have to be really serious about that core sadhana thats
the real work.




(2.65) Because if you were, as I was suggesting to you
last evening, it shouldnt take all that much time. But you
have to eliminate all the arbitraries and vacations and
picking and choosing, live by My Instruction directly, and
get seriously involved in this matter of the listening
sadhana, first of all, which winds up locating the
self-contraction as your own action. But its a complex
self-study, so to speak. You have to observe and look at
yourself, examine yourself, be examined and reflected to by
others, for some period, because all that helps you locate
this thing, sensitizes you to it.




(2.66) Up until now youve been trying all kinds of ways
to be desensitized to it, however, whereas the sadhana, the
listening sadhana, is about becoming directly sensitized to
it, to the point where you realize it is your own action and
are always in the position of going beyond it. Because its
not apart from you. Its always you, so you always can do it.
So thats the hearing sadhana, then, from then.




(2.67) Now, there arent many doing the hearing sadhana,
even after so many years. Maybe some of those will do some
of it soon, but it does not suggest to Me that theres a lot
of them that are even possibly up to that. So most of you
here are not on that utterly believable list. Even though
youve been around Me for a long time. So what youre all
suggesting by your sign to Me is that we talk about some
very ordinary matters here tonight. [Beloved




(2.68) DEVOTEES: No, no, no.




(2.69) AVATARA ADI DA: [Beloved chuckles.] No?
Well, yes ! Your history in My Company, Im talking about you
particularly, generally speaking, your history in My
Company, even though you profess seriousness, does not, has
not proven seriousness in any sense that weve been
discussing here the last couple of evenings. And generally
you all are said to be 1.2 practitioners, but I could point
out major deficiencies in the case of every one of you-who
says you are a 1.2 practitioner, you know? And those
deficiencies, among other things, would include forms of
practice you havent established yet, which are at the
foundation and your business as a student-beginner.




(2.70) So theres a lot of student-beginner left in you
all. Thats why youre not moving on. A lot of lack of
preparation, or establishment of adaptation to basic
practices. And the attitude of Ishta-Guru-Bhakti Yoga, that
attitude that makes you practice it moment to moment and not
just occasionally and in the Hall, you see. Because the
self-contraction doesnt wait for you to go to the Hall to
show up, and then you work on it. Its operative twenty-four
hours a day. Your humble servant. [laughter] Your
ass-pinching thumb and forefinger. [laughter] Thats
what I used to call the “three-day thumb and finger
problem”, remember?




(2.71) DEVOTEES: Yes.




(2.72) AVATARA ADI DA: Well, if you truly establish the
foundation practice as a student-beginner, and move on to
1.1 and 1.2, you have a right to hear Me at any time. But
dont ask to be taken seriously if the cultural review board
cant say that all the details of foundation practice are in
place. If theres something missing among all of that, I cant
take your hearing seriously. You know?




(2.73) Because if theres all kinds of business not
handled, theres all kinds of things you didnt look at to
tell Me you heard Me. You know? You didnt look at them
enough to straighten them out. So, wheres the hearing,




(2.74) So the hearer is a straightened-out cat, you know
what I mean? Not a sloppy-joe, good-hearted guy, who says
the right thing and tries to talk his way into




(2.75) AVATARA ADI DA: Was that all that you wanted to
talk about, Dan?




(2.76) There was supposed to be a number of questions,
werent there?




(2.77) DANIEL: Well, other people had some questions,
too, Beloved.




(2.78) AVATARA ADI DA: Did you finish yours?




(2.79) DANIEL: Yes.




(2.80) AVATARA ADI DA: Who else has something?




(2.81) JULIA KNOX: I have a few questions, Beloved.




(2.82) AVATARA ADI DA: Tcha.




(2.83) JULIA: Youve Said that in our best moments and in
our worst moments we are always Narcissus. And I was
wondering if that was a description of the fact that were
not identified with the seventh stage disposition.




(2.84) AVATARA ADI DA: Yes, Narcissus, yes. In other
words, the self-contraction is the basis of your every




(2.85) JULIA: Because prior to the seventh stage
Disposition, youre always contracted. Youre always
identified with that which is not inherently Recognizable in
the seventh stage Disposition. Is that what that is a
description of? Ive always interpreted it as kind of a
moralistic thing. I overlaid a moralistic connotation on “in
your best moments and in your worst moments youre always




(2.86) AVATARA ADI DA: You were thinking of that in
moralistic terms?




(2.87) JULIA: Mostly.




(2.88) AVATARA ADI DA: Being good versus being bad and
that kind of thing? Well, thats one way of looking at it.
But theres also the good moments of, you know, great
pleasure and sudden wealth, whatever, and then the medium
moments, and then the really dark moments, and so forth. So
its, the description covers all aspects of your experience.
“Good moments and bad moments” covers every possibility.




(2.89) And, what about that?




(2.90) JULIA: Well, it seems to me that its kind of an
inherent description of what Youve been talking about
tonight, that one is Narcissus in your best moments . .




(2.91) AVATARA ADI DA: Right. Whatever we may mean by
“best” and “worst”. And so?




(2.92) JULIA: Is that a description of the fact that
previous to seventh stage Enlightenment, youre never free of
the position of being in the fear, being afraid, being
identified with an individuated body-mind, and so on?




(2.93) AVATARA ADI DA: Yes. Separated body-mind,




(2.94) JULIA: Separated body-mind.




(2.95) AVATARA ADI DA: Dissociative, therefore.




(2.96) JULIA: So it doesnt matter any time . . .




(2.97) AVATARA ADI DA: Its not just that you feel
separate. Youre doing the act of being separate, so it
coincides with the separative disposition also, altogether,
a dissociative disposition. So the form of verbal Enquiry
Ive Given you thats the equivalent of that gesture, you see,
is “Avoiding relationship?” If thats what it amounts to, its
not just that you feel tacitly separate, individuated. Your
life is about self-contraction, the avoidance of
relationship, dissociative intentions. Youre always breaking
out of unity into the crush of separativeness, and it can
have very dark qualities to it ultimately.




(2.98) Do you understand?




(2.99) JULIA: Yes, Beloved. Thank You.




(2.100) AVATARA ADI DA: And the second question?




(2.101) JULIA: It was about Your Description earlier this
evening of the sixth stage practice, the second stage of the
“Perfect Practice”, and You Described that Witness-Position
in a way that Ive never heard described before, or dont
recall, or wasnt penetrated by Your Description of
before-about how youre still, its, its a combining yourself
with the seventh stage Disposition or moving in and out of
That. And it sounded to me that when You were Describing it
You were talking about that sixth stage practice, about that
being in a meditative circumstance. You Said you dont . .




(2.102) AVATARA ADI DA: Well, thats the most intensive
form of the exercise, because you step apart from
psycho-physical obligations.




(2.103) JULIA: But I also, I guess that theres something
about that that is curious to me, because of Your Presence
here. The fact that that Contemplation of You when youre
walking around and working and doing anything . . .




(2.104) AVATARA ADI DA: Mm-hm.




(2.105) JULIA: . . . is so-I guess I dont perceive of a
difference between doing that sadhana in the sixth stage
practice and doing the one thats in the meditative
circumstance where youre going deeper into. . . I dont
understand . . .




(2.106) AVATARA ADI DA: While a sixth stage practitioner
is doing that? Or earlier?




(2.107) JULIA: Well, I was specifically talking about as
a sixth stage practitioner.




(2.108) AVATARA ADI DA: And what happens?
[laughter] [Beloved laughs.]




(2.109) NINA: I think what my client is trying to say . .




(2.110) AVATARA ADI DA: Yes.




(2.111) NINA: . . . is that she cant understand how in
the sixth stage of practice there would be a difference in
meditation between the Contemplation of You and the practice
outside of meditation.




(2.112) AVATARA ADI DA: Well, it neednt be entirely
different, of course, but in the meditative exercise of the
“Perfect Practice”, you step apart from all psycho-physical
obligations towards the most profound exercise of the
disposition of the “Perfect Practice”. It is not about doing
this and that with the body-mind and its relations. Its
Standing Prior to it and entering into the depth of That.
Well, that exercise moves you out of the realm of attention
into the domain of Being Itself. And then after the
meditation you become reassociated with so-called ordinary
conditions again.




(2.113) In that circumstance, youre just as much My
devotee as before, I mean you still do all the devotional
practices and so forth-its not that now, you know, an hour
ago when you were in meditation you were in the Divine
Self-State and now all of a sudden youre an ignorant fool,
you see-no, its just that you become reassociated, as My
devotee you become reassociated with conditions with all
their usual implications, and so forth. And youre not in the
Well. You tend to recede from the Well.




(2.114) Well, of course as the sixth stage process
becomes more and more profound, there isnt that movement out
of the Well so readily. And there is still a persistent
residence in It, even in daily life. So it becomes more and
more profound. And thats how it ultimately becomes the
seventh stage Awakening, by becoming profound, because at
last there is this sensitivity to the presumption of
“difference” between the Divine Self-Condition and objects,
conditions. Hm? And that you had to go into the Depth
somehow or recede from all of that somehow, in order to be
Established in the Divine Condition, or the Free
Condition-its just the last noticing of the gesture of
self-contraction, of separation, and the human drama of
separativeness, egoic “self-possession”.




(2.115) And its then that the Oneness of conditional
appearance and the Divine Self-Condition becomes inherently
Obvious. And thats how everything becomes Recognizable, as
it truly Is .




(2.116) But how did that relate to your question?




(2.117) JULIA: Thank You, Beloved. You answered my




(2.118) STANLEY: Beloved, its amazing, how we spoke last
night and then again earlier this evening about language.
And how it really happens spontaneously. There isnt time to




(2.119) AVATARA ADI DA: And by the way, everything does
just exactly the same. Speech is, you normally presume, a
very voluntary, specifically intended something. And you
tend to think of a lot of other aspects of yourself as being
less voluntary, maybe. So just noticing the fact that in
order to think you dont think first, somehow, you magically
somehow conjure it, it seems, without making even the
slightest gesture. So thats true of thinking and of
speaking, which is associated with thinking. But its true
relative to absolutely everything that arises. If you would
simply inspect it.




(2.120) Not only speech or thought, but everything
arising, youre associated with all of it in exactly the same
way. So the sixth stage process is about entering into that
Depth, Prior to psycho-physical association, Prior to acts
of attention, because youre always Prior to attention, Prior
to speech, Prior to thought. These things sort of magically
collect in some interesting state of awareness. But
everybody knows its all Light. If you break everything down
to parts, you finally get to just Light, Energy Itself, you
cant reduce It further. Theres no more parts.




(2.121) Do the same thing subjectively, get through all
of your self-presumptions, thoughts, all the rest, theres
simply Consciousness Itself, and It cannot be reduced
further, cant be broken into parts.




(2.122) So the Inherent Reality is not something totally
alien to you. You know things about It, you presume things
about It. But you forget about It. If your attention is
directed to such “consideration”, then all of a sudden it
seems very important to you. But otherwise youre all over
the place being ordinary and egoically “self-possessed”.




(2.123) Stanley, what were you saying?




(2.124) STANLEY: Beloved, I was saying that, like You
Said, Beloved, ultimately everything is Light, and Ive
observed a couple of times this evening, and its happened
many times in the past. Sometimes, Beloved, Youll ask, “What
did I just Say?” or “Did that cover it?” And since speech
comes from not a thinking spot in space or anything, when
You Speak, Beloved, its always that Light, its always
Perfect Truth. You dont recall anything that Youve Said
sometimes before. But always Perfectly its exactly and
utterly what should be, What Is. And its the same in Your
Bodily Sign when You Say that things are constantly going
on, the same as speech, but everything that Your Bodily Sign
is, Beloved, is of total Transcendence of it all and
Perfection of it all.




(2.125) AVATARA ADI DA: But not by dissociation, you see?
I had to do the sadhana with the body. Of the body, and all
the rest. It had to be purified and conformed to Me. So its
not merely a leftover, having been pushed further and
further away to the point where its like a piece of garbage.
It had to be invested in the sadhana altogether. Every
aspect of the body-mind or the psycho-physical personality
must be submitted. And it is Transformed sufficient for your
Realization in the process.




(2.126) Well, what else would be interesting to talk




(2.127) STANLEY: It seems the things that are most
interesting to talk about, Beloved, is enjoying what we
spoke about both last night and this evening, without
getting into anything that Youve already Elaborated on so
many times in the emotional-sexual and other dimensions.
Instead, talking about Consciousness.




(2.128) AVATARA ADI DA: Yes, I Said when we were back in
Purnashram, I dont talk about that stuff anymore. Ive Said
everything that needed to be said about it and many times
more, everything that could be said about it. And we have
all our agreements, and that “consideration” is done and now
its got to be preserved and everybody study it and adapt to
it. So there shouldnt be any need to spend time with Me
talking about such matters.




(2.129) Thats another reason why Ive become even more
urgent about having practitioners at level 2 and on, because
there are new things, further things that I need to address,
and certainly have, in summary, addressed everything, but
there are also more things to be said in a circumstance with
people who are practicing at an advanced level. Its a higher
level of “consideration”, which Ive entered into, but not so
much in dialogue, because there werent people truly
practicing in that disposition.




(2.130) So some of that dialogue will be useful to have.
But its just that I dont have any Work of the kind I was
Doing before, enough to Do to Occupy Me. Im still here, for
all devotees from the beginning of their practice, and
theyll continue to come into My Company, as weve agreed. But
I dont have a lot of interaction with them to do, in the
sense of before. So I dont want to just be waiting around My
House for people to get serious with Me. Its not enough to
have the daily Darshan occasion for half an hour with the
staff and people on retreat.




(2.131) That serves, and it will continue, but its not
enough for Me to be Doing.




(2.132) So I thought it would be useful here to have some
“considerations” about this matter in greater depth than Ive
heard anybody talking to Me about it.




(2.133) STANLEY: Beloved, I feel like, in doing so Youve
also been making something extraordinary available to all of
us, even in our beginnerness. Because last evening You
Gracefully allowed us particular Realizations in that moment
. . .




(2.134) AVATARA ADI DA: Mm-hm.




(2.135) STANLEY: . . . which were far beyond what my and
other peoples practice are up to altogether.




(2.136) AVATARA ADI DA: Mm-hm.




(2.137) STANLEY: And, uh . . .




(2.138) AVATARA ADI DA: Well, its like the Garbage and
the Goddess time . [Devotees murmur agreement.] It
wasnt that everybody was, by virtue of the experiences they
were having, suddenly capable of advanced practice and so
forth. It wasnt the intention, either. The intention was to
serve the argument which Id been proposing constantly from
the time I began formally to Teach.




(2.139) But Realization is neither a search for nor an
attainment of any kind of an object or conditional state. I
refer to it as garbage, and so forth, using the metaphor of
Rudi always handing Me a bag of garbage behind his back as
he hugged Nina. So this was My Instruction to you.




(2.140) Well, the gathering as it was then only
represented a certain range of experience, not particularly
great, rather of the normal kind, ordinary kind. So in order
to advance that “consideration”, elaborate on it, and Give
everyone the basis for getting the point I was trying to
make, I entered into a Disposition by which devotees started
having all kinds of experiences.




(2.141) But I always addressed them in their report to
Me. “I experience such and such,” wed go through the
argument and ask about the self-contraction, and so
on-remember? [laughter] “And youre still doing that
even so.” So that was the purpose it was intended to serve.
Well, as you point out, in our “consideration” last evening,
you all having various experiences along the lines of My
“consideration” with you as you sat here quietly-its an
example of the same thing. You actually, by Grace, entered
into the States I was discussing, suddenly had an
intelligence and an experience that enabled you to feel It
exactly. Right through into the seventh stage




(2.142) But, of course, youre not prepared to do the
sadhana of those advancements yet, generally speaking. But
its useful for you to grasp what this is all about by
becoming most intimate to My “consideration”, to feel it
most profoundly. You dont necessarily have to come and sit
in a small gathering here with Me to do it. Some do that
sometimes, and its recorded, so-in other words I intend it
to be of use for all devotees. I expect them all to be just
as serious and to enter into these “considerations”
profoundly, on the basis of having all the practices intact
and for real. My devotee.




(2.143) And taking Me seriously and really practicing in
the midst of studying My Word, there can be some
coincidences in feeling or experience that correspond to
very profound things. And you have experiences even as
beginners in My Company, Spiritual experiences of one kind
or another, and so on.




(2.144) So these things are not Given to you in order to
somehow suggest to you you are now capable of advanced or
ultimate stage practice. They are Given you to inspire you.
They represent breakthroughs or purifications also. But they
also support and intensify your intelligence, your
discrimination, your understanding, your observations.




(2.145) So its always the case-any devotees who
participate with Me profoundly, address My Word through
profound “consideration”, Contemplate Me truly moment to
moment-that this kind of a process occurs. It should be
characteristic of My devotees. But the process of the
“consideration” of My Word involves, in the midst of their
practice-perhaps right then in the study “consideration” or
in the Hall, whatever-it involves the awakening of depths in
you, Gracefully, that can understand My Communication
profoundly. So it Gives you a further basis for knowing how
to make use of My Word, in the circumstance of your correct
sadhana at the moment.




(2.146) Your experiences sometimes are about things far
advanced from your present stage of practice. That doesnt
mean you go and do those practices. You do your present
practice. Let those experiences serve you, even as a test.
You can have some really grade-A meditation some day, you
know? Blisses and visions and Yogic all this and that, and
you can get full of yourself about it, but start craving it
and somehow governing your meditation time psycho-physically
to orient yourself to having that kind of experience again
rather than doing the direct sadhana Ive Given you to




(2.147) So people, then, get into these repetitive games
of making their bodies mechanical, or do something
internally and so forth, that are not about really doing
that self-transcending sadhana, that self-forgetting,
utterly self-surrendering sadhana, but theyre about still
being locked into an egoically “self-possessed” mechanism,
rehearsing the pursuit of some kind of a state or other they
may have tasted a bit about.




(2.148) So, it is as I was Saying even from the
beginning, this is all garbage. Any kind of clinging
attachment to kinds of experience, whether theyre brilliant
or ordinary for you, modifies the force of existence, limits
it, defines it. And then becomes a distraction from sadhana
and makes your sadhana just wheel-spinning or time-passing,
until you break through it again and change your ordinary
course of so-called sadhana into the real practice of the
Way of the Heart, this “radical” or most direct practice of
going beyond the knot of egoity itself rather than basing
life on the knot of egoity and making an adventure of life,
making an adventure of life on that basis, including
constantly seeking that which you know not .




(2.149) You make a whole life of that knot.




(2.150) Havent we talked about that about fifty times
tonight? Anybody got a different kind of a question?







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