Ken Roche

Dear Ed, I’am happy to find the Beezone. I feel the same way about
Adidam as you wrote in the, ” What is the Beezone”? article. I’am in
the Beezone too. I came to know and “hear” of Franklin Jones shortly
after he first published ‘The Knee of Listening’ in 1973.

In late 1974, I went to Persimmon, and hungout for several weeks.
Actually crashed in a room on the floor of one of the old Siegler
Springs cabins, that hadn’ t been renovated yet. Billy Tsniknas, used
to give me dirty looks when I drove in and out of the grounds in my
old Dodge Dart. One day he told me if I was going to stay around I
needed to get a hair cut, I looked too much like Gen. Custer. I
remember thinking, fuck you, I’am not cutting hair for the likes of
you! Pat Morley was real good at giving bum vibes, maybe that is why
they married.

Anyway, I remember ‘ sitting’ with Bubba. We were told not to sit
too long at first, no more than five minutes. We got ushered through
his office one afternoon. Offered prasad, looked at him for a few
seconds, then sat off to the side. They announced our names just
before we went in. I remember looking at him, sitting on one of those
small couches, in a speedo swim suit, snapping the elastic on his
right leg, as he stared vacantly off into space. No acknowledgement
of our presence. I was curious more than anything in those days.
Never seen a God Realized human. Thought he looked plainly average.

Then about ten years later, I was a formal student, living in L.A.
We used to go up to the Scantuary once a month or so. There were
about two hundred of us in the hall that afternoon. Bubba came in,
sat and looked at a few individuals, then kind of zoned out.I became
aware of an increase in the light in the room and I looked off
towards the little windows on the wall expecting to see the sun.
Instead I looked back at Bubba. He was starting to dissolve in a
light which was plainly coming from his body, specifically from the
left side of the chest. His face was changing features as the light
grew in intensity. He became a succession of different people,
finally, the light dissolved his form as well as everybody in the
room, then everything was just this brightness for some length of
time. Finally, the process reversed itself, and we all reappeared. He
got up and walked out the back door. People were crying, talking in
whispers, trying to get up and move about. We all were still
saturated by that presence. Outside, tears gave in to laughter, and
amazed conversation, as people shared the event with each other. A
female friend, going back to high school in Montana, was also there.
She’d been a devotee ever since I’d given her The Method of the
Siddhas, ten years before. We were speechless for some time.

I left the community in the late eighties, after the fallout from
the O’ Mahony, Miller stuff. I’d probably have left anyway. It has
only been in the past few months that I’ve made contact again. I did
visit the Seattle center a couple times in 1999, when I worked out
there. But, I didn’t follow up. My recent contact has been with a few
long time devotees. By longtime I mean since about 1988 or 90.

I took one telecourse this past summer. So I’am caught up on what
is going on. I was invited to formalize again. I was even invited to
go to a retreat at Lopez Island, but, I wiggled out of it. Lately,
I’ve been going through the dissident material on the web. Curious
about anything with the name Adidam on it, which brings me to you.
All I know is that the spiritual process given and lived through Adi
Da, is REAL . And, if a person is serious about Realization, then
stand there and take like a man, or woman, or get the fuck out. Some
of the negative stuff is pretty hideous. You’d think that Adi Da had
murdered thousands of innocent people in tall buildings to read some
of this shit. So, he fucked your old lady and you had to watch, or
you wanted to watch, but later thought you didn’ t really. I mean, it
seems to me that most of this stuff is just sour grapes. There are a
lot of whiners and cry babies having tantrums. As for me, well, I’am
content to stay on the periphery, do my meditation, and feel back to
that day twenty years ago when the room melted. That Presence is just
as tangible today for me as it was at the time it happened. Only
difference is that I’am responsible for my relationship to it far
more now than then. I feel Him for hours a day, no matter what I’am
doing, or where I’am. That is I think, what it’s supposed to be.
Thanks for your website, I’ll read more. Sincerely, Kent Roche